


Prologue of the Prologue: Nelora Mahariel

by ArtsyGirl



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: Arlathvhen, Best Friends, Betting, Buckets, Call of the Lost Lover, Caught, Character Death, Chasing, Childhood Friends, Childhood misadventure, Chores, Confusion, Curiosity, Dalish Elves, Dalish Origin, Dalish Sexuality, Death, Denial of Feelings, Descent into Madness, Diary/Journal, Eavesdropping, Elfroot, Errand, Exploring Sexuality, F/F, F/M, Fear, Feelings, Feels, First Armor, First Lessons, Fishing, Fluff, Forgetting, Friendship, Fun, Gen, Girls Kissing, Growing Up, Halla - Freeform, Hunter Training, Jealousy, Kissing, Late at Night, Light Angst, Losing Herself, Love, Madness, Magic, Meditation, Meeting Someone New, Mischief, Ominous Sketches, Pain, Pregnancy, Pregnancy Scares, Reading, Realization, Self- reflection, Shame, Sketches, Smutty Books, Smutty Literature, Sparring, Summer, Talking, Talking Things Straight, Tears, Teasing, The Call of the Forest, The Call of the Madness, Training, Unplanned Pregnancy, Vallaslin, chatting, forest, mirror, river - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-28
Updated: 2018-05-31
Packaged: 2019-05-15 00:11:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 15
Words: 27,383
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14779916
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArtsyGirl/pseuds/ArtsyGirl
Summary: Prologue of the Prologue: Nelora MaharielThis story ges back quite some time from the time Mahariel was a child and goes forward to the fatal day with the blighted Eluvian or as they know it at that time- a miror that has something in it that moves.





	1. Wild Fox Chase

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 8 year old Nelora Mahariel and her best friend Tamlen are sent out to gather herbs not far from the camp but they get distracted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Childhood means simplicity. Look at the world with the child's eye - it is very beautiful." - Kailash Satyarthy

  
Nelora and Tamlen are sent out to gather herbs near the camp but it isn´t nearly as exciting as being on the hunt with the hunters, trapping, tracking, reading the signs of nature, finding game and much more.  
  
Nelora is displeased with their assignment and it is showing. Her usual fieriness and happiness are wiped away from her face when the elders pulled them out of a fun game to do this. She is dragging her feet, huffing and puffing like every herb weighs a ton and is nearly impossible to gather into the basket. The corners of her mouth are turned downwards and sadness is lurking behind her amethyst eyes. For Tamlen the situation is not as bad as it is for her but still he’s not enjoying it either.  
  
The girl complains jet again "Why do we have to pick these herbs I’d better be out learning how to hunt because that is what I’ll be when I´m older, a mighty hunter."  
  
Tamlen is sick of her whining so the least he can do is to whine back to blow out some steam "Stop it Nelora you are not making me feel any better. This is dull enough. You’re complaining sucks all the will to work out of it."  
  
They both are quiet; the sounds of a lively Dalish camp not far away fill the empty space between them. The birds are chirping in the trees and that gives Nel a few ideas.  
  
She asks with a hint of mischief in her voice: "Tamlen are you still bored?"  
  
He is sitting on the ground in an elfroot gold mine when he looks up to her and answers „Of course I am. Why do you ask?"  
  
She drops the basket and points to the trees. „You hear many birds chirping in the trees then they must have a nest and many birds have many nests. So... Do you want to check them out?"  
  
He turns his gaze back onto the herbs and reminds her unenthusiastically “Remember what happened the last time we did that? We were chased around the forest by an angry woodpecker then we ran into some swans who we, mostly you, too managed to make furious.” He runs his index finger on the pink scar left on his left hand. “Thankfully some elders came and chased the birds away. Afterwards we got scolded at the camp, yet again.” He lets out a heavy sigh “It was a lot worse than the time with the ducks and the wild turkey.”  
  
Nel giggles and smiles brightly “What can I say we have the worst luck with birds or they just hate us because of some mischievous birdy reasons.”  
  
The elven girl sits next to her friend and still tries to convince him that she has a good idea “You know what? Let’s give it another shot. These are tiny birds and tiny birdies are less dangerous.”  
  
Tam shakes his head vigorously, still keeping focus on herb picking unlike his best friend “No way even if you take all of the blame this time. By the way tiny beaks can cause a lot of pain too.”  
  
Nelora pouts, crosses her arms and turns up her nose and declares: “You are no fun Tamlen!”  
She keeps her pouting very exaggerated so that her best friend would finally give in and do as she wants. The elfling keeps it up for a while but gives up because she sees that it isn´t working this time. Ah well, maybe better luck next time.  
  
About an hour goes by and both children are focused on their work  
  
Tamlen blows his stubborn honey blonde bangs away for the umpteenth time and comments with relief “Now I think this was the last elfroot that was ripe for picking in this place.”  
  
The girl announces “I’m disappointed.”  
  
Why would she be like that, we finally finished this chore, he should be happy “Why so?”  
  
She lifts a branch of a bush and looks under it as if trying to find something “I thought that there would be more herbs in this place. The Elders are going to be disappointed too. I just know it!”  
  
Tamlen remembers something he overheard should he tell Nel about it. What harm can it do? “You know Nelora yesterday I heard a few of our clan mates speak that further in the forest there is supposed to be a gold mine for elfroot.”  
  
Her eyes light up “Then we will go and see that ourselves.”  
  
There is the harm. The boy whines. “Not again, we’ll get into trouble!”  
  
“Where is your sense of adventure?”  
  
Tamlen looks at his fresh and pink scar on his right hand and speaks in a quiet but sincere voice “It is gone because your adventures always end badly.”  
  
Nelora starts begging: “C´mon please…”  
  
He stays firm. “No!”  
  
Nelora still keeps going but makes cute puppy dog eyes this time “Pleeeease Tamlen.”  
He is less confident now. “No Nelora. Not this time.”  
The girl is furious and stops begging: “Fine don´t come then! I´ll go off in to the woods alone! More adventure and fun for me and not for the wuss who didn´t dare to break some rules. No game, no gain!”  
She turns her back on him and starts stomping deeper in to the forest. Tamlen grows less sure of himself with each step she takes away from him. Finally he breaks and yells: “Wait for me too you furious, clever manipulator!”  
  
****  
  
While exploring the forest Nelora spots a fox in the distance. She stops and grabs Tamlen´s shoulder to signal him to stop.  
  
He doesn’t like to be pushed around even by her, especially her but she always manages to do that, somehow. This time he’ll tell her that, maybe she’ll be less manipulative and headstrong with him. “I really…” Nelora puts her hand on Tamlen´s mouth so he would stay quiet. He doesn´t like it at all and starts to protest but Nelora points to the fox.  
  
He pushes her hand away. “What about it? It is just a fox.”.  
  
The other elfling turns to him with a frown “Don´t you remember when Hahren Paivel told some story that foxes can lead to secrets?”  
  
No he does not. Where would she get an idea like that? “I think you may have dreamt it lethallan.”  
  
She puts a finger on her mouth, “Oh shush you! I don’t care if you believe me or not but now I'm going to follow that fox.” as headstrong as ever.  
  
“That is a bad idea Nelora.” He didn´t notice that she was already sneaking towards the little fox.  
The young boy ponders to himself “We will get in to trouble as always with her brilliant ideas. I think that we are in trouble right now too. No way I’m going back to camp alone and be scolded, alone.”  
  
The Girl is hiding behind a bush when he reaches her. She teases him “I see that you finally caught up.”  
  
“Yeah, yeah stop mocking!” he said a little too loudly so that the fox heard it and started running away.  
  
Nel nudges him “Look at what you did with your loud whining, now we have a fox to catch!” as soon as she said that she lounges after the poor tiny creature that was already frightened enough.  
  
Tamlen just looks at Nelora with big surprised eyes, the mixture of grey and light sky blue, as she chases the orange animal.  
  
Nelora yells at him “You coming or what?”  
  
Tam gets up from the ground and joins the chase.  
  
They make crisscross laps in the forest.  
  
“Through the bushes Nel!”  
  
“Low branches up ahead Tam!”  
  
“Thanks I´m past them!"  
  
They keep running but Tam is faster than her so he is getting ahead. He issues her a new warning: " Oh no! Slippery mud Nel!”  
  
They chase the fox for a while: The chase doesn’t just involve running but slipping in the mud, tripping behind tree roots, dashing through bushes and the occasional bumping head against tree branches.  
  
“The fox is headed your way Nel!”  
  
“No it is heading your way!”  
  
They both are running towards the animal and just under their noses the fox slips in to its lair. They slide like crazy because the forest floor is mostly slick mud.  
  
Two friends can´t stop at the right moment and run in to each other.  
  
They both lay on the ground. Silence creeps in and just like that they start laughing out loud and from their hearts. Both of them sit up on the ground covered in mud, still laughing franticly. They fail to notice that they’re sitting on top of a hill. As a consequence of Nelora trying to lie down she starts to roll down the slope. When she is at the bottom she is still giggling.  
  
Tamlen starts to make his way down to her and asks “You alright?”  
  
It is hard to see where Mahariel begins and the nature ends. Her ivory skin is not showing at all from all the mud that is covering it, there are many leaves and tiny twigs in her clothes and hair; he must look quite similar to her. The girl answers “Just covered in more mud, tiny twigs and grass, otherwise I´m fine!”  
  
They keep on laughing just like they are in a trans.  
  
The two friends have calmed down a lot. Time to go back home, they don’t want a rescue party to be sent after them.  
  
Tamlen reaches out a hand for Nel “Let me give you a hand so you can get up.”  
  
She smiles. Her teeth look even whiter with her dark and muddy face. “Thanks!” She reaches out for his hand and starts to pull herself up but she can´t.  
  
At first she is confused and then panicked. “I can’t. My hair is stuck!”  
  
He lets go of her hand and takes a few steps towards the seeming source of stuckness. Nelora had stopped just in front of a big tree that had lodes of sap oozing from it. This doesn’t look good at all.  
  
“Nel your hair is stuck in a tree’s sap.”  
  
She punches the ground with both of her fists. “No you have to be kidding me!” There are tears gathering in her eyes. She looks down on the ground and then up to him. “You have to help me!”  
He does not know what to do; the panic is building up inside him too. Don’t show that you are panicked to her; she’ll be even more scared. “Me? How?”  
  
She squeezes her eyes shut, one tear from each eye slides down her muddy face. Her voice is like a sad whisper “I don´t know try pulling it.”  
  
Does she know how painful this is going to be? He needs to make sure that she knows what she is asking. “Won´t that hurt?” he is still concerned for his best friend.  
She hugs her knees. “Yeah it will but I just want to be free of it!”  
  
His hand brushes against his pocket. It has something in it. He reaches his hand into it and feels some wood, leather and metal. What is it? He gasps in realization. It was given to him before going herb picking, maybe this can help Nelora. "Wait Nel I have a knife. It was given to be for those pesky herbs that are too tough and don’t want to be plucked. It would be better if i used it. Are you ok with that?"  
  
She is slightly trembling, the thoughts of what is going to happen if she is stuck here forever are crowding her mind, it is very unlikely but they are still there, scaring her, not helping at all. Without realizing it she cries out "Fine, do it! Just get me loose from here!"  
  
“Ok Nel I will count to three. One, two, three.” He starts to cut her hair loose from the sap. She is crying out in fear but when he wants to stop she tells him to keep going despite her emotions.  
  
Finally she is free from that cursed sappy tree. Nelora still has tears of terror streaming down her face. She gets up and hugs him.  
  
“Thank you for helping me out and coming with me, otherwise I´d still be stuck, alone, sad and…”  
Tamlen sooths his best friend “No need to cry Nel, we´re best friends and best friends always have each other’s backs.”  
  
She whispers into his ear “Thank you for being you, Tamlen.” She now hugs him even more  
tightly.  
****  
  
They are walking back to the camp.  
  
Nel is curious “Where did we leave our herb baskets?”  
  
He tries to remember very hard but he can’t. What if they’d try to retrace their steps? – Bad idea, with all the crisscrossing around the forest they may get very lost. It is easier to go back to camp and then go back to the herb picking site, yeah that’s where they probably are but then again he can’t be sure. “I have no idea, maybe at the place where we gathered them.”  
  
She nods “I do hope so." Her hair looks very strange. It is chaotic, very short in some places and long in others, much of it still has some sap stuck to it.  
  
She tries to run her hand through her hair but fails, the damned sap has stuck it theater in many places and it would hurt a lot to just pull her hand through. She has no idea what it may look like but an idea of a birds nest comes to her mind, what might Ashalle think of all this. She asks: "Do you think Ashalle is going to be mad?”  
  
He scans her, a lot of dirt, scratches, leaves, tiny twigs and a little bit broken clothes. “She´ll be furious.”  
  
The girl has her nose up high like some noble and asks: “So you did not give me a professional and a stunning haircut?"  
  
He snorts but goes along with her goofing around “Absolutely the best for the best, my lady.”  
  
He gets a tiny giggle from her.  
  
Nel asks carefully: “Sooo…Want to stay in the forest to avoid the fury of others, mostly the fury of the elders? ”  
  
“I´d love to but they will find us.”  
  
“Yeah you are right maybe some time in the future.”  
  
Tamlen chuckles and reminds her: “You know that you are going to get another haircut at the camp.”  
  
She frowns. “Don´t rub it in, today has been tough on me.”  
  
He has a cocky smile “I´m never going to let you forget that adventure nor the new haircut you are going to get because sap doesn´t was out. And oh i bet I bet it is going to look terrible.”  
  
She says sarcastically: “Haha really funny.”  



	2. Arlathven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Every ten years, the Keepers of the Dalish clans convene in a meeting called the Arlathvhen, which lasts usually two days, to compare any recovered knowledge or artifacts. During that event also some members from different clans get relocated.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "There's something about childhood friends that you just can't replace." - Lisa Whelchel

  
It is late summer. The sun has just risen to the sky. There are no clouds in sight as if someone ordered the perfect weather for this special day.  
  
Nelora is very excited. She barely got any sleep. The youngling walks out of her tiny tent. The clan is very lively. They are all preparing for it.  
  
Nel can barely take a few steps when Ashalle stops her in her tracks “Now where are you going, young lady?”  
  
She shrugs “Nowhere in particular. I just wanted to look around and see how everyone is preparing.”  
  
Ashalle raises her eyebrows; she has this look of a condescending mother about her right now. “If everyone is preparing then why aren’t you?”  
  
She grunts “Ughh I just got out of my tent.”  
  
Her ‘mother’ wags a finger at her “No excuses. You will go and gather firewood for the bonfire.”  
  
She knows that there is no point to arguing with Ashalle, she has tried it many times but not even once has she succeeded. Nelora nods “Yes Ashalle.”  
  
The older woman gives her the ‘you better do as I say’ look and orders “Go quicker and no wondering around, getting distracted, getting into trouble or other fun things. Did I make myself clear?”  
  
She understands no fun at all, how amazing. “Yeah, yeah I got it. You don’t have to keep telling me these things. I’m no child anymore.”  
  
Ash is being sarcastic “Of course you are no child anymore. You are quite the grownup at age 13.”  
  
Now she is making fun of her. I can be quite the adult at age 13! “Oh stop it.”  
  
The older elf raises her hands in the as if she’s surrendering “Whatever the grownup says.”  
  
“Very funny.”  
  
She smiles, dimples appear in her pale cheeks. “And you thought that ole Ashalle can’t make a joke. Now off to work with you.”  
  
“I’m going, I’m going.”  
  
Nelora starts walking away. There is so much going on. Some elves are cooking, some are cleaning and making sure that the ascetics would be the best, some are gathering wood, some are bringing in fresh game to be cooked and some are missing, they are probably out there hunting or handling the firewood situation.  
  
She glances back and sees Ashalle looking at her to make sure that she gets to her job. It is going to be hard to slip away from mother Ash’s motherly gaze. It is simpler just to get the job done.  
  
She goes to the forest near the camp where the other firewood gatherers are. It seems that there are some who are chopping wood and cleansing the forest of the dead, not so healthy and the trees that are hindering other trees’ growth. Others are just picking up the chopped and sawed wood as well as stacking it.  
  
She can see someone waving to her. It is Fenarel “Aneth ara Mahariel!”  
  
She smiles slightly “Aneth ara Fenarel. May I join the wood gathering?”  
  
He picks up his axe again and continues chopping wood. “Hey the more the merrier.”  
  
She has to remind herself that here is a bright side to this. “And more people means that it will be over quicker too - yay.” That didn’t sound very enthusiastic.  
  
She starts picking up wood.  
  
Fenarel tries to make conversation “Let me guess Ashalle sent you.”  
  
She picks up a few pieces of wood. “You’ve got that right.”  
  
He snorts “It was about time. You were one of the last elves in this clan who wasn’t doing anything.”  
  
“And you are the responsible one who always does the chores even before you are asked to.”  
  
He laughs “You are just jealous.”  
  
“Sure. Keep telling yourself that.”  
  
Fenarel is not that much older from her. What was it a year or two? Something like that. He is such a pushover when it comes to cores and being all polite, proper and things. When he is in the company of his peers then he can be pleasant enough conversation partner.  
  
****  
  
It has been a couple hours of handling the wood. Finally it is over. She has never really liked chores or being told what to do. Ashalle often complains: when she will grow out of it. Seriously grow out of not wanting to do chores and being told what to do?! – Not likely to happen.  
  
Nelora is heading towards the camp to find her best friend. She needs to complain about the wood gathering and express her exaltedness for the Arlathvhen .  
  
As the girl makes it out of the forest to the border of the clan area she spots a slumped figure under a tree and walks over to it.  
  
She is standing behind the elf now, he looks very familiar, is it Tamlen? The person speaks “Hi lethallan.”  
  
It is Tamlen. Why is he here? “Tamlen? What are you doing here?”  
  
“Sitting and thinking.”  
  
She nods “I can see that. Why are you sitting and thinking all the way over here?”  
  
“It is quiet.”  
  
So it’s dragging words out of him this time. Nothing she can’t handle “You can pretty much always find that kind of peace in the camp. Are you alright and why are you so gloomy?”  
  
He looks troubled. “I’ve been washing dishes since this morning and finally it is over.”  
  
So they put him to do chores too, makes sense. To be honest washing dishes isn’t that bad of a job. “I know how you feel. I was out gathering wood for a long time too.”  
  
“Still beats doing the dishes.”  
  
She laughs a little “Yeah I don’t quite agree. You know that made me feel better that I was not the only one unhappy with the preparation chores.”  
  
He drops his head in his hands, he looks frustrated. “You can be very mean, you know.”  
  
What did she do now? Doesn’t matter, she’ll go along with it and do the bitch act: “Uuu… You found that out just now?”  
  
He looks up to her like she proved his point perfectly just now. “That’s what I’m talking about.”  
  
She sits down next to him and leans on the tree. “Chores are chores but chores don’t make you feel so down.” She gives him a friendly nudge, “What is truly wrong Tam-Tam?”  
  
He stares off in the distance. “It is the Arlathvhen.”  
  
The Arlathvhen? It is such an amazing event, what could be making him so sour about that. “What about it? It is so exiting! We may get some new clan mates!”  
  
He tilts his head back “Do you know the cost of it?” He lets out a heavy sigh “At whose expense it all happens?”  
  
She is confused “What are you talking about Tamlen?”  
  
He runs his thumb along the scar on his left hand. He only does it when he is nervous. “Arlathvhen happens every 10 ears. Keeper tells us that the main reason for it is to share the knowledge that the clans have gathered. There is also a secondary goal that is actually more important to us. It is the exchange of people. Someone from other clan will come here and someone from here will go there. It is a way to get some fresh blood.”  
  
She turns to face him. “And why are you worried about that? It is not like they are going to send you away.”  
  
His voice is shaky just like when someone is trying to act normal while holding back their sobbing “That is exactly what I’m afraid of.”  
  
It is absurd, does he know how silly that sounds? “You’ve got to be kidding me Tam. There is no way they would do that. You belong here!”  
  
“Well look who is speaking – the last of Mahariels. There is no way they would send YOU away because of all that has already happened to your family line but there is nothing that is holding me in this clan.”  
  
Now he can’t mean that, he is full of rubbish in this front but what if he is right? “No they can’t do that. I won’t let them take you away.”  
  
He stops tracing the scar and looks in her eyes; she can see genuine uncertainty in them. “Do you truly think that they are going to listen to you? You are just a kid like me and nobody is going to ask what the kids want when important decisions are being made.”  
  
By the Gods, he may have a point. This is so unfair, it can’t happen. She feels a little empty inside. “Tamlen I’m so sorry. But you don’t know what is going to happen, so we have to hope for the best.”  
  
He frowns. His voice is barely loud enough to be heard, it breaks her little heart. “Hope for the best? Is that all you’ve got.”  
  
Nel can’t be gloomy when this could be the last time she spends time with her best friend. She can’t let him be like that either. They both should lighten up. She leans her head on his shoulder “It is better than volunteering to be the exchange elf and it is better than whining. Suck it up and toughen up.”  
  
“It is easy for you to say.”  
  
“It is but it doesn’t make it any less true.” There is a brief moment of silence.  
  
She gets a tiny smile from Tam-Tam “You won’t let it go unless I do as you say, will you?”  
  
She grins “You know me well enough that I won’t.”  
  
“Fine. I’ll try.”  
  
The corners of her mouth rise. She stands up and starts bouncing “Now to get your mind off these bad things. We are going to ‘borrow’ some delicacy food from the cooks.”  



	3. Arlathven: The Night of Change

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It is the night of Arlathvhen and the dreaded moment of the relocation of clan members is at hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Friendship means understanding, not agreement. It means forgiveness, not forgetting. It means the memories last, even if contact is lost." - Anonymous

  
It is the second night of Arlathvhen. Their clan has been the host for this one. Many of the different clan members are dancing around the bonfire, mingling, eating and having a good time. Even Tamlen seems to be more cheery than before.  
  
The Keepers are finished and show up. Every elf is quiet now. The exchange time has come.  
  
Marethari declares: “We have shared all the knowledge. It was all very smooth and results bearing. We have saved a lot of the culture of the old dales, but there is still a lot missing. The progress has been great in these 10 years. You all should be proud.”  
  
Everyone is still quiet  
.  
Another Keeper steps in. He has a very deep and attractive voce: “Now for the most dreaded and waited moment of the Arlathvhen – the relocating of some clan members.”  
  
A small buzz of nervous banter rises in the crowd.  
  
A keeper with long red curly hair and a squeaky voice calms them: “There is no need to worry about it. The clans are very welcoming. It may be scary at first but with some time the new clan will feel like home. Don’t be afraid because we are the dalish and we are strong.”  
  
The second male Keeper continues: “Let’s get started shall we?”  
  
****  
  
It was nearing on dawn when they finally made it to the people who will be leaving clan Sabrae.  
  
Nelora takes Tamlen’s hand. Their fingers intertwine.  
  
Marethari announces: “Zevvel, Samhel, Merrinaya, Mariel and Tamlen.”  
  
Tamlen is squeezing Neloras hand. She can’t believe that his fear could have come true. She is ready to object, to stand up for Tam-Tam. She opens her mouth and…  
  
Elowin from clan Sabrae stands up “I would like to go to the other clan.”  
  
Marethari seems to be surprised: “Are you sure child?”  
  
“Yes I am. I’ve met somebody in the clan where Tamlen was supposed to go.”  
  
“So be it. Elowin you will take Tamlen’s place in the other clan. Tamlen you will stay with the Sabraes.”  
  
Elowen bows slightly “Thank you Keeper.” She runs towards a handsome elven lad in his twenties. They look good together.  
  
The Keeper with the deep and attractive voce declares: “Now the relocating of clan members has ended. I hope you all will be happy with the new arrangements.”  
  
All the elves recite together as one: “We are the Dalish: keepers of the lost lore, walkers of the lonely path. We are the last of the Elvhenan, and never again shall we submit.”  
  
After that the casual conversation comes back in the crowd.  
  
Nelora releases Tamlen’s hand and tells him coldly: “You better go and thank Elowen before she goes away.”  
  
He hugs her. “That is probably a good idea.” Her best friend runs off to thank Elowen.  
  
Nelora just sits there and looks at him running towards Elo. She feels this great shock and sadness within her. Could they truly take her best friend away so easily? She can feel her eyes get watery.  
  
Behind her a soft and shy voice says: “Hello I’m Merrill.”  
  
Nel quickly wipes her forming tears away and turns around “Aneth ara Merrill I am Nelora.”  
  
The shy elf sits next to her and asks: “Are you one of the members of clan Sabrae?”  
  
“Yeah, that I am. And I’m guessing you are the mage who was transferred to us.”  
  
She nods “Indeed.”  
  
Nel places a hand on the elf’s shoulder “I’m so sorry that you were sent to us.”  
  
“When there are too many mages in one clan then they get sent away to other clans to insure the mage gets the proper training and that magic doesn’t die out amongst us.”  
  
The line she just recited was propably what her clan told her about why she needs to go away. Mahariel feels sad for her but she is not going to touch the subject beacause Merrill seems like she is going to cry if she does so. The poor mage has gone through enough unpleasantness. Neora decides right there that she is going to take the shy elf under her wing and that they are going to become friends.  
  
“Merrill if you need anything then you can always come to me. Welcome to the family.”  



	4. The First Armour

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tamlen and Nelora Mahariel have just begun on their journey of becoming hunters. This day they are going to get theri first armors and first not quite training lessons.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Difficulties mastered are opportunities won." - Winston Churchill

  
The sun is high in the sky when Nelora Mahariel and Tamlen get called to Junar, their soon to be trainer.  
  
Junar hands them 2 sets of armors. One set for Nelora Mahariel and other for Tamlen.  
  
She accepts it gracefully. There are 2 braces, boots and the main body piece. The leather is hardened, rough and has a fresh slightly rotting smell to it, a smell that many dislike, but strangely enough not her. The stiches that keep the different bits and pieces of it together are large but strong. It is not tinted like the fine hunter’s armors but she doesn’t mind at all because it screams practicality for her. By the gods this is something special for her. This is her first protective garment that she does not have to share with anyone.  
  
Junar scratches the back of his head. “I know that these armors may seem to be a little rough around the edges but they are protective enough to get you through your training.”  
  
Nel is so happy that she just wants to bounce up and down over and over again. She takes a deep breath to calm herself so she would not sound like a squealing mouse when she expresses her gratitude to Junar .Her eyes sparkle “Thanks! This is perfect.”  
  
“No problem Dalen.” He looks at the two new gear admiring elves “What are you two waiting for? Gear up!”  
  
When Nel gets back Tam and Junar are waiting for her.  
  
“Now that Ms. Slowpoke is here… pick up some arms. A sword and a shield will suffice.” He gives her a moment and then explains: “Before your training officially begins I’ve got to find out on what level of development you are.”  
  
She throws her right hand on her hip to add some sass to her comment: “SO what you are going to battle us?”  
  
“Nothing that harsh. You two are going to be sparring and I’ll observe. And don’t worry these are practice swords, they don’t cut, much.”  
  
Clearly Nel was not the only one in whose head the much part rang a warning bell. Tamlen seemes to be curious or afraid “What do you mean by much?”  
  
He clears his throat and mutters “Well you see if enough force is applied in the right direction with the right or wrong moves then it can leave some cuts. These are still sort of swords that are made to be as close as possible to the real thing.” He stops slouching and continues explaining with a clearer voice “The armor will protect you from things like that but it doesn’t mean that getting hit won’t hurt or that there won’t be any bruises.”  
  
Nelora picks up the shield with her left hand. The thing is so heavy. It has seen some better days but it is perfect for training. She makes sure that it is on her arm sturdily enough. She then picks up the long sword. She is not really fond of those, too heavy and clunky for her tastes, she prefers something lighter that moves faster, but right now they should be on equal terms with Tamlen so Junar can evaluate their skills better. She does not know why but the feeling of pre combat jitters hits her from just gearing up.  
  
Mahariel moves to the sparring spot and readies herself. Tamlen too arrives. They both are facing each other. Her palms are sweating slightly. She keeps her breathing nice and calm. Their shields are pressed together and the swords are at a ready to be used. They are now waiting for the start call from their trainer.  
  
The trainer hunter grabs a chair and sits down. He gives the order: “Start!”  
  
Tamlen quickly shield bashes her so hard that she falls to the ground. Her shield hand felt the full force of the blow. She realizes that she can’t take many hits like that without it being very painful tomorrow.  
  
It was quick. She fell on her tailbone. Waves of pain travel through her body. Damn how that hurts. She tries to get up but Tamlen has his practice sword on her neck. She had lost this round.  
  
Junar shifts himself in his chair. He leans forward and says: “Again.”  
  
The two combatants ready themselves again. She shakes off the slight tingling in her shield arm.  
  
Junar’s voice is clear and professional. “Begin!”  
  
Tamlen shield bashes her again. Once more her left hand gets a taste of full shield bashing force. Her arm is hurting now. This time she needs to get up faster and not be stuck in her thoughts or pain--- to late Tam’s sword is at her neck once more.  
  
Junar gets more serious and leans even more forward as if he was trying to see and analyze every tiny move they make. The usual joy and easygoingness is gone from his voice: “Get up and get ready!”  
  
“Begin!”  
  
She angels her shield so that the force of the shield bash would not fully hit her and that he would go off to the left side. The force is still too much and she loses her balance then Tamlen comes again with another shield bash. She falls on her back once again. The ground is bare and cool. The smell of fresh dirt crawls up her nostrils. As she lay on the ground her opponent disarms her and she has lost again.  
  
Junar repeats: “It’s like you’re not even trying. Again!”  
  
Nel’s left hand is hurting a lot from being the battering ram’s target and her buttocks is acing from the constant falling on her sodding arse.  
  
“Begin!  
  
She fails.  
  
“Again!”  
  
“Begin!”  
  
She is on her back again  
  
“Again.”  
  
“Begin!”  
  
She fails again, again and again. Something has to change. Even if she manages to avoid the first shield bash then when Tamlen just as much as pushes her with his shield and she blocks it with hers then she loses her balance and he uses that to win. This time she’ll ditch the shield.  
  
“Get ready.”  
  
The two trainees take a fighting stance.  
  
With a clear voice he gives the start: “Begin!”  
  
Nelora dodges skillfully the first shield bash and throws the shield on the edge of the sparring area. She already feels lighter. Now Tamlen is charging at her again. She simply steps out of his way on the last second. Tam switches the shield bashing tactic to attacking with a sword. Nelora maneuvers her way around the blows with dance like motions and then she finds herself next to him. His sword-arm open for a pressure-point blow. She hits his arms inside opposite from the elbow with all the force she can manage with her sore left hand. He loses the strength in his arm and drops his sword. She quickly picks it up and positions herself behind him with his neck between the 2 swords. She won this one. She can still feel the leftover adrenaline rushing through her body, dulling all her aces.  
  
Junar leans back in his chair and now says with his casual, not trainer voice: “Well done Mahariel. This is it for today.”  
  
She can feel her heart beating strong in her chest as if it was about to jump out. All of her body is filled with heat. A sweat drip drops from her nose. Her breathing is deep and heavy. Her body is trying to get enough oxygen after that exertion.  
  
Junar stands up and says to her kindly: “You can stand down and let your opponent go.”  
  
She is surprised. Unbelievable that she had already forgotten about Tamlen being at her sword-point. “Oh, of course.” She stands down. “Sorry, I forgot. This was just so intense.”  
  
Tamlen moves his shoulders in a circular motion and mocks her: “Hey I forgive you because you lost so many times today that it is taking a toll on your memory.”  
  
She kicks him in the ribs with the butt of her sword. Then she smiles brightly clearly pleased with herself and walks to the shield she threw away.  
  
The kicked elf croaks: “Low blow.”  
  
“If it truly were a low blow then you would be on the ground hurdled up in a ball.”  
  
“You wouldn’t dare.”  
  
She turns around and they have a fierce standoff just by looking in each other’s eyes trying to intimidate the other person. She says something between the lines of growling and happy gloating: “Test me.”  
  
Junar walks between them and utters with his usual happy easy-going voice: “I know that sparring is very competitive but leave it for the sparring ground, will you.”  
  
Nel slightly nods, agreeing. Then they both look at Tam to see if he will do the same.  
  
“Yeah fine. There’s no way I could stay mad at Mahariel.”  
  
“Great that you kids are getting along. So tomorrow we are going to have another sparring session right here at sunrise. Do not be late!” He turns on his heel and starts walking away “Hey put away the swords and shields all nice and proper!”


	5. Risque literature

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It is a beautiful night. The sky is clear and Mahariel wants to go stargazing with Merrill but when she enters her tent they find something more interesting to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "I have never thought about my sexuality being right or wrong. To me it has always been a case of finding the right person"- George Michael

  
It is early night. The sun has just stetted and Nel is going to see Merrill at her tent.  
  
When she gets there she can see light glow through the walls of Mer’s settling.  
  
She opens its door and sees her girl bestie reading something.  
  
“Aneth ara Merrill.”  
  
The elf jumps and quickly slides the book under some furs. The tent is darkly lit because two candles can’t bring that much light but it is enough to see that Merrill’s ears and cheeks are slightly pink. What can she be blushing about now?  
  
She rambles nervously: “Aneth ara Nelora. I… I didn’t know that you were there. I didn’t know that you were coming either. I wasn’t doing anything. Wait how long have you been there? Not that I’m suspicious or anything. I’m just curious. ”  
  
“Calm down. I just came here. And the reason for my unannounced arrival is because there is not a cloud in sight in the sky. Can you believe it? – The sky is finally clear and the stars they are just so beautiful. ”  
  
She answers awkwardly. It is clear that her thoughts are not fully with her: “Yeah the stars are pretty. There haven’t been truly clear skies in a month or so… But why did you come here?”  
  
A sweet smile comes onto Nel’s face: “Do you remember the times when we snuck out in the middle of the night just to see the stars. We stayed out all night long finding the constellations and just having a good time. I was wondering if we could bring back old traditions.”  
  
Her eyes light up “Uu that was wonderful. The stars were so pretty like the fanciest and shiniest jewels a noblewoman’s jewel box. It was always fun just talking about personal things and having time away from the clan.”  
  
“You are so sweet Merrill but…” She has a wicked grin on her face “I’m more interested in what you were reading that made you blush so much.” Nel quickly grabs the book. The hunter training is paying off she has become quicker.  
  
Merrill tries to snatch the book back but fails. She cries out: “Nel don’t…”  
  
The book is beautiful. It is bound in Very dark red leather and has simple but classy golden letters on the cover that spell: “Lady’s guidebook”  
  
She opens the book. The paper pages were of fine make and the writing on the first pages are really flowing and fancy. She skips a few pages and starts to randomly go through the book. It has a lot of illustrations of people in rather intimate positions, engaging in even more intimate activities.  
  
She can feel her face burning. She has a discussed feeling in her gut but there is pleasure and curiosity in it too that keep her from putting the book away. Finally Merrill manages to grab it from her hands.  
  
Nel is just standing there blushing awkwardly. Gods she must look like a tomato.  
  
Her voice is shaky: “What was that Merrill?”  
  
Now it is the other elf’s turn to feel awkward: “A book that I found.”  
  
Nelora sits next to her. She says with genuine surprise: “I had no idea that something like that might interest you. You always seem so innocent and pure of all the sins of this world.”  
  
She giggles “Me pure of the sins and dirty thoughts? – You know me more than that to know that it is not true.”  
  
Nel smiles. “Yeah you actually have the dirtiest mind when everyone else can’t see anything.”  
  
Merrill keeps giggling “And when something is obviously dirty to you then I can’t see it.”  
  
The tension and awkwardness is almost gone.  
  
The ‘innocent’ elf asks with a clever fox like face and voice: “So do you wanna do some reading?”  
  
Nelora answers with a wolfish grin: “For the sake of Fen'Harel YES!  
”  
****  
  
Nel laughs loudly “I seriously thought that it was as simple as enter the object B into the part A and boom- ready.”  
  
Merrill falls over laughing. She is hurdled up in a ball tightly hugging her stomach.  
  
Mahariel tries to pull off her serious act but fails quite miserably at it “I’m serious. It is just now today that I found out otherwise. Apparently love making is an art and has a lot of nuances.”  
  
Mer sits up and wipes the tears of laughter away from her eyes. “I used to think that babies came from kissing. When I found out that it wasn’t true then I got this complicated theory that fade spirits and magical walking trees were involved. It wasn’t very long ago when I heard about sex.”  
  
Nel’s eyebrows shoot up “Are you serious? Fade spirits and walking trees?”  
  
“Hey at least my version was interesting unlike yours that was lacking any kind of fantasy and creative thinking!”  
  
They go back to the book and turn the next page.  
  
Known among the dwarves and some humans as Orzamar flip, known among the elves as Fen'Harel’s favor and among some humans as 69, though the first two names for the given position are more common.  
  
There is a simple but clear picture below depicting a woman and a man doing the Fen'Harel’s favor.  
  
With the given sexual position id does not matter which sex any of the participants are. It can be successfully acted out between 2 women or men or one man and a woman.  
  
Nel is squeamish. “By the gods do they eat with that mouth?!”  
  
Merrill has a mock serious voice “Both of them are eating something…” She winks at Nelora.  
  
Nel coughs “Not what I was thinking about. But seriously it seems wrong and disgusting and very dirty. And I mean dirty like unclean not the other way. ”  
  
“I don’t know. It does not seem that bad to me. When you really like someone then it doesn’t matter. It seems more intimate, appetizing and…”  
  
“And what…”  
  
“Dreamy.”  
  
Mahariel crosses her arms “Oh really?”  
  
She tries to prove her point: “ Now would you milady Merrill do the Fen'Harel’s favor to Fenarel in front of a statue of Fen'Harel while trying to speak of Fen'Harel with a mouthful of Fenarel whle you Fen'Harel?”  
  
Merrill’s face flushes red all over she is looking down with shame. She whispers: “You are awful.” and turns the next page in the book. Her blush is still not going down. Mer tries to change the subject: “Oh look the next page!”  
  
Nelora has a satisfied grin on her face. She shifts closer to the book and asks: “Now what do we have here the reversed aravel, wolfy stile, the magic mountain or something else?”  
  
“This page is about kissing.”  
  
She is surprised: “Kissing? Shouldn’t something like that be in the beginning of the book?”  
  
“I think so, but there’s nothing I can do about it.” She turns a few pages and comments: “There is a lot of information about kissing. From what your lips should feel like to different tongue techniques and what you should do with the rest of your body.”  
  
“That seems useful.”  
  
They begin reading. Some time passes and Merrill asks: “Have you ever kissed someone?”  
  
Nelora is surprised, again. “Me? Nothing more than a peck on the cheek. Have you?”  
  
“I haven’t either. I’m already 15 and still no experience what so ever.”  
  
A sudden sensation of kinship with Merrill hits her, there’s something else that they have in common. “I know right. I wonder sometimes what happen if I kiss someone and I’m terrible.”  
  
“Yeah. I feel the same way.”  
  
Nelora looks off in to the distance asks: “What if we would try to practice kissing right here and now?”  
  
Merrill is confused, did she hear correctly?. “What did you say?”  
  
She repeats: “What if we were to practice kissing together?”  
  
“Umm…Alright but this will stay a secret between us.”  
  
Nel smiles: “Absolutely.”  
  
Mer blushes slightly and comments: “Here we go.”  
  
Nelora shifts so close to Merril that she can feel her breath. She reaches out one hand and places it on the other elf’s cheek. She slightly turns her head to right and leans close to her lips. She gives Mer a few tiny pecks of kisses. Then she slowly begins kissing her lower- and then her upper lip. She is gently sucking it. Her hands are on Merrill’s neck and in the middle of her back pulling her slightly closer to her. They begin to kiss harder. Nel slides the tip of her tongue on Mer’s lips for her to open up. Their tongues meet and begin to dance in their mouths. She can feel Merrill’s hands hugging her more and more tightly. The kissing is becoming even more intensive they are sucking slightly biting when the tent door opens and a familiar voice speaks:  
  
“I saw a slight light glow through the tent and I heard the faint eco of you and Nelora speaking and thought…”  
  
He looks up to them and words keep failing him. He’s mouth is open comically out of shock. They are still closely intertwined but they suddenly realize that he saw them and they pull apart.  
  
Neora wipes her mouth with her hand and speaks: “Tam it is…” Tamlen’s face is redder than Nel has ever seen. She glances over to Mer to see if she is blushing too but no – Merrill is as calm as ever.  
  
He cuts her train of thought off: “I ummm… I… I should leave you two here to do whatever…alone. I saw nothing!”  
  
He swiftly goes away. The two girls look at each other and burst into laughter.  
  
Merrill’s laugh and voice are very song-like at this moment. “Gods I have never seen Tamlen so red and embarrassed.”  
  
Nel wipes away her tears of laughter “Me neither. I don’t believe that he is going to be able to look at us normally without blushing for a while.”  
  
There is a moment of silence between them.  
  
“You know Mahariel you are a great kisser.”  
  
She smiles and bows a little “I thank you for the generous compliment. If I may say so then you are not bad either but I think that I’ll stick to kissing members of the opposite gender. No offence.”  
  
“None taken. But this was fun.”  
  
“Indeed. It is getting late and I should go back to my tent.”  
  
“Bye Nel.”  
“See you tomorrow I mean today. I believe that the new day has begun already. And Merrill do not throw away or put that book back where it was.”  
  
“Don’t worry I won’t.”  



	6. Wicked Ears and Spooked Souls

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nelora Mahariel is sent on an errand.  
> This should be easy and boring, not much can happen but then again this is Mahariel who we are speaking of, nothing is just easy.  
> Nelora is on her way to do Ashalle's bidding but at one moment she isn't alone. There are two other elves, Tamlen and Fenarel. They haven't noticed her yet. Should she go about her business as usual or listen in for a moment. Should she take the high road or go down the sneaky mischiefy lane, again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Any place is good for eavesdropping, if you know how to eavesdrop."- Tom Waits

  
Mahariel is told to fetch some water for Ashalle. It is the big laundry day for them.  
  
She is carrying two empty buckets to the river but when she gets near there she can hear people speaking, she can make out two voices.  
  
Should she eavesdrop, nah just go and take the water and return to Ash.  
  
A few steps taken forward she can now see that the two talkers are Tamlen and Fenarel. A great inner debate is going on inside her, to go about her day or just stay for a moment to listen. It would be wrong to stay and listen but it could be very awkward when she comes at a bad time. Better listen to a few sentences and then make a decision if it is a good time to interrupt them momentarily with her water.  
  
Nel puts down her buckets and sneaks a few steps closer. She hides behind a tree and peeks out at the two. They are fishing, strange when usually Keeper sends 3 of them to fish but not this time. Were they there to pass time or Tamlen didn’t want her around. The curiosity grows inside her, she must know.  
  
Fenarel pulls out an empty hook, takes an earthworm from a pouch and slides it onto the sharp object. He throws it skillfully back into the water. “You are acting strangely today, what is going on?”  
  
Tam shrugs “Nothing really.”  
  
“Hey if it were nothing then you wouldn’t be distracted all the time, wouldn’t make these big pauses when you speak, wouldn’t keep away from people…” Keep away from people? Is she concluded in those people or the ‘people’ is her? “… and you’d react faster.”  
  
“What, I react just …” Fen throws him with some water plants at Tam. The plants land on his head. Green hair made of water flora does not quite suit him. The other elf protests “Why did you do that?”  
  
“To prove a point.” He dries his hands into his clothes and picks up the fishing rod again. “If you were alright you would have dodged or caught it.”  
  
Tamlen takes the mass of water plants off of his head, his hair is dripping now. “You don’t know that.”  
  
“I do know that. It is a part of the bases for the hunter training that you are in right now, that I was in too. So spill the beans.”  
  
He sighs “Honest to the elven Pantheon, it is nothing.”  
  
“Oh if it is nothing then you wouldn’t mind if I called the third fisher here, she was actually sent here too.”  
  
The answer comes as soon as the last word leaves Fen’s mouth “No, not Nelora!”  
  
What did she do? It can’t be about her and Merrill, can it?  
  
“Oh, I see. What is it this time? did you two get into a fight?”  
  
He looks off into the distance and sighs “Of course not, nothing like that.”  
  
A sense of realization can be seen on Fenarel’s face. He seems to be quite enthusiastic “Did you finally make a move on her?”  
  
Tamlen’s left quiet and confused “What are you speaking about?” Yeah what is he speaking about?  
  
He shrugs “I don’t know. I’ve always thought that you have a thing for her and she has a thing for you.” She can’t believe what she just heard. Her and Tamlen? Is he being serious? He is isn’t he? Just no! No, no, no, no, no. They are friends, best friends and nothing more. It should be clear to everyone.  
  
Tamlen blushes. He’s voice is shy and quieter “I…no. Where would you get an idea that I like her, she is like a sister to me. This is so wrong. I would never…” Tam runs a hand through his wet hair. “Besides she already…” He stops speaking. What does she already?  
  
Fen isn’t joking anymore, he seems serious. “Then it truly is about Nelora.” He jokes “So what, did you catch her with someone?” Oh, this is painful. What will Tam-Tam say, please don’t talk about what you walked in on. It was a onetime thing, just having fun with Merrill, yeah just fun… She has a sick empty feeling in her stomach. Like her entrails are hollow and twisting, she wants to hurl. She should go away now, it would be for the best but as she tries to take a step back she finds that her curiosity is bigger and that she has to know what happens next.  
  
Tam’s face turns white and he focuses on the floater indicator that shows if the fish are biting.  
  
Fenarel looks shocked. He is curious “You did! With who?”  
  
Tamlen shakes his head. “I don’t know what you are talking about.”  
  
“The only person you are fooling right now is yourself. And if you are going to be so tight lipped then when we get back to the clan then I can ask Nel myself. I’m sure she’ll be more talkative and that she has some better explanations’.” Oh please don’t Fen.  
  
Tamlen seems to have the same idea as her “Don’t. I’m not sure of what happened either, it may be a misunderstanding.”  
  
There is pause between them. A gush of fresh and cool air blows through the forest baring the sweet smell of forest lilies.  
  
“It was not very long ago, not at all when I heard some giggling and saw some lights. Then I thought what harm can there be in a surprise visit, it wouldn’t be the first time when one of us crashed at someone’s tent. But when I opened the door ten they might have been hugging but I doubt it, their lips were locked together, but then again I might have seen it wrong.”  
  
“I’m sorry.”  
  
“For what?” It can be very traumatizing to see your best friend give their attention to someone else, especially the type of attention she was giving. It would be most awkward if she were to walk in on Tamlen and someone, it would be understandable of course but she would not like to see her best friend in that light and she thinks that nor would he.  
  
She feels sorry for staying and listening, she just should have gone and take the water and be done with it. What to do now, she needs the water but she can’t take it from near here. It means she has to go further down the river, lovely, just lovely.  
  
Nelora turns away from the two fishing elves and starts to head for her buckets.  
  
She hears Tamlen speak “I think I’m done fishing for today. The fish aren’t simply just biting”  
  
“It has been a terrible fish day but I’m going to stay for some time, maybe the luck will turn.”  
  
“You do that. Fenedhis lasa! ” She has to do something, go away? - No Tam would see her, too little time for that. Hide in the bushes? – Too noisy and the bushes can be very thin in some places so the risks for getting spotted are pretty great. For the sake of sodding rat droppings! As she is thinking where to hide Tam is packing up his fishing gear. She doesn’t have a lot of time, she doesn’t have ANY time!  
  
The first thought that hits her is to hide in a tree with her buckets and wait for him to pass.  
  
She makes a move for the buckets and quickly climbs a grand oak. The tree has many large branches and a lot of leaves, hopefully she will be hidden.  
  
Nelora makes it just in time. She can see Tam beginning to walk from the river. This is so intense; she is holding her breath.  
  
Tamlen mumbles to himself “Why did I have to be awake and walk in on Mahariel and Merril being all friendly. I can’t look neither of them in the eyes after that moment. It is just too weird.” He sighs “I am so not looking forward to the next training lesson because she’ll be there.”  
  
He is just under her. Please don’t notice an elf in the tree, please don’t notice an elf in the tree…  
  
The branch is cracking under her and before she realizes she is plummeting towards the ground.  
  
She doesn’t fall on the ground, why didn’t she fall on the ground, she expected to fall on the ground.  
  
She hears someone grunt and realizes that she fell on Tamlen. She quickly jumps up. This could not have gone any worse. Should she make a run for it? – No that would be stooped but what she thought was smart turned out to be dumb so…  
  
Tam shakes his head “Nelora?”  
  
Oh crap, how will she explain this?  
  
“Indeed. What were you thinking about that you didn’t keep an eye on trees; do you know how dangerous it can be?”  
  
“I know…I know. We aren’t always the hunters. If we don’t pay attention then we might become the hunted. You are beginning to sound a lot like Junar.” She manages an awkward smile.  
  
Nelora holds out a hand for him, he takes it and she pulls the other elf up. Not that much awkwardness has occurred, hope it goes on like that.  
  
Now that he is up he is looking into her eyes and blushing, he won’t let go of her hand.  
  
Thoughts of panic fill Nel’s head. He knows that I was listening in on them. He is going to be furious or awkward or… she doesn’t know. This is going badly. She is turning red too. This is the most awkward she has ever felt. She just wants to sink into the ground and not exist.  
  
Every second feels like a year. Tamlen’s bush goes down and he asks “What were you doing in the tree?”  
  
Make something up, fast. “I… Uhhh… was bird watching? Yeah, bird watching, you know like we used to do when we were little.”  
  
He raises an eyebrow “Really?” Is it getting hot in here? It is getting hot in here. Ground please open up and swallow the one known as Nelora Mahariel.  
  
“But why are you still holding on to a bucket? And why is another bucket on the ground?” What happened to the not paying attention part that Fenarel pointed out by the river side? He is really putting her in a pickle and there is no way that she is going to admit to what she was doing.  
  
“You see… ummm… I was actually sent to fetch some water but then I saw some birds and got distracted, you know how I am, how I’ve always been.”  
  
“Uh-uh.” He seems skeptical. “So it’s a laundry day and Ashalle sent you out to get water.”  
  
She nods.  
  
“But why would you climb a tree with a bucket?”  
  
“I wanted to catch a bird, yes you heard me right.” She can’t read him. Probably he is as confused as her, hopefully even more so.  
  
He lets go of her hand. “How long have you been here?”  
  
“Not that long really. I walked into the forest, got here, saw a pretty bird, had a stooped idea to go bird watching and perhaps catching and fell down. I wish that I’d have a better explanation but I don’t.”  
  
“So you didn’t hear people talking by the river?”  
  
She tries to look confused. “What people? I thought that you were fishing alone.”  
  
“Hah! How do you know that I was fishing?”  
  
She points at the fishing rod and is being sarcastic “Yeah, you carry that thing with you for fun.”  
  
He looks down on the ground towards his scattered stuff “Sorry for that.”  
  
“No problem.” She picks up the other bucket “It would be great if you’d stop interrogating me and I could get the water. You know that Ashalle isn’t the most patient person.”  
  
He is avoiding her gaze now. Seriously it was just a little kiss between her and Mer. It would be sad if he wouldn’t get over it and they stopped being friends.  
  
“Of course.” he begins to pick up the fishing supplies “And so you’d know Fen is by the river side. Wouldn’t want you giving him the scare you gave me.”  
  
She nods and walks away.  
  
That was interesting. Now all she has to do is get the water, bring it to Ashalle and hope that she won’t be mad for her taking her time.  



	7. Talking Things Straight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mahariel has had it with Tamlen acting strange. It is time to work things out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Every time I thought I was being rejected from something good, I was actually being re-directed to something better." - Dr. Steve Maraboli

  
Seriously this little drama between her and Tamlen and some part Merrill must be over soon because it is just stooped and it gets in the way of normal life. But what does she have to do?  
  
The other day by the river Fenarel suggested that she’d simply talk things straight with him, but how? What should she say?  
  
She sits under a tree on the edge of the camp. Sun shines through the leaves leaving beams of light coming through the branches. It is a lovely summer day. Temperature outside on the scale of glacial to burning alive - is hot. The camp’s calm today, no one really bothers doing something because they may risk getting hot and sweaty. Even the animals are calm and try to avoid excessive movement.  
  
She loves the summer and this lazy and hot weather greatly due to not being made to do anything.  
  
Snapping of few twigs can be heard from the forest. Mahariel turns to see what it was and sees a beautiful wild halla. The creature has the poise of a king and elegance of the wild vines. It isn’t unusual for the wild halla to be so close to the camp but still mostly the younglings come because of their curiosity. It would be grand if this beauty would just come a little closer so she could win its trust.  
  
It is like the creature could read her mind. The glorious halla is slowly coming closer to her. Don’t look intimidating, be relaxed or you’ll scare it away. No fast movements. It is s few steps away from her, she has her hand reached out. Just a little more then they’ll make contact. The halla takes a weary step closer and suddenly runs away.  
  
Nelora is confused, it was going very well. The creature sort-of trusted her and then it just ran away. What happened? Something must’ve scared it. She can see someone moving from the corner of her eye. It was this person who scared it away. She looks back to where the halla was, hoping that it would come back. But the gallant creature is gone. She is going to give this halla scarcer a piece of her…Someone trips on her feet.  
  
Her eyes are open wide, she is surprised. An elf lay on the ground in front of her- the halla scarcer. She opens her mouth to give them a good scolding but upon realizing who the elf is she says “Tamlen?”  
  
The other elf jumps as if spooked too. He gets up at a comical speed. His face is white as if he had seen a ghost “Nelora?! What are you doing here?”  
  
What an odd question, can’t he see? “Sitting.”  
  
He desperately tries to explain himself “Actually I thought you were some roots that I stumbled behind. I…I couldn’t see you, sorry.” He begins to walk away.  
  
This is her chance to talk things straight with him. “Tamlen, wait!”  
  
He stops in his tracks. Tam just stands there and doesn’t even look back. So it is up to her to make the first move.  
  
Nel stands up and walks over to him “I was actually hoping to catch you. We have to talk.”  
  
He seems to be really uncomfortable and eager to go away. “It really isn’t the best time…I…”  
  
“Just shush and listen.”  
  
He closes his mouth and nods.  
  
She tries to look into his eyes but he is avoiding her gaze. “You’ve been acting very strange since that night with Mer.”  
  
“Well…I…”  
  
She raises her hand “Hey, I’m not done yet. Ok I do understand that it was very awkward and stuff but it is no reason to avoid people and act strangely. It was just a little smooch between two elves that you walked onto. And it was a one-time thing, you know.”  
  
He seems to be surprised. He’s voice is quiet and soft “It was?”  
  
“Yeah, it was.”  
  
He looks at her “So it didn’t work out between you and Merrill?”  
  
“What?! That is absurd. Where would you get an idea that me and Mer…?”  
  
He is awkward once more. Tamlen looks of into the distance and rambles “I thought that you two were together together, like a couple.”  
  
So that is what it is about. She laughs out loud. “There was never a me and Merrill as a couple, we are just friends, that’s all.”  
  
He blushes slightly “But I saw you two there, kissing.”  
  
She smiles brightly “It was nothing serious, we were just having a little fun experimenting. As I said it was a one-time thing.”  
  
“Oh is that really so?”  
  
“It is so.”  
  
There is a brief moment of silence between them. She can see Tam-Tam thinking about something, it is like some gears are moving but she just has to be patient and wait.  
  
Finally he asks “But why?”  
  
“Hey we are young and curious; better us than us and some stranger.”  
  
He’s face changes color to a lovely shade of pink. “Well this was…is awkward.”  
  
“You’re telling me that…But are we alright now?”  
  
“I think so.”  
  
She reaches out a hand “Let’s shake on it. Friends?”  
  
He takes it “Friends.”  
  
“As a future reference when you go to give someone surprise visits then do knock. You can never know what you’ll walk onto.”  
  
“Don’t rub it in.”  
  
“What, it is just some friendly advice.”  



	8. The First Hunt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Before a Dalish comes of age they have to prove that they are worthy to bare the Vallaslin . The first hunt awaits.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "You must not only aim right, but draw the bow with all your might." - Henry David Thoreau

The First Hunt  
Both Tamlen and Mahariel have been apprentices long enough now is time to go for the big Hunt, now is tie to pass the rite to adulthood and leave childhood behind.  
  
It is an early morning, the sun is rising and the sky is cloudy, thick mist has wrapped itself all over the nature so it’s difficult to see anything.  
  
Tamlen and Junar are waiting for the other young hunter apprentice. The older elf seems to be a little grumpy “Now where is that girl? Is she seriously late, it is her big day.”  
  
“I’m sure that she is sharpening her arrows and daggers, but just in case I’ll go and check on her, I’ll be back soon.”  
  
“Be swift, it is your time that’s wasting, we don’t want young hunters to be on the hunt more than a day, you know.”  
  
“I understand Junar.” Tam runs off to his probably sleepy friend. He is sure that she is not tending to her weapons or gear, she is probably sleeping. She has always been a sleepyhead and e always has to be the one to make excuses for her, it just gets tiring.  
  
He is makes it to her tent and the sound of soft snoring emits from there. He was right. He knew she’d be asleep. Damn it Nel, why do you do this all the time.  
  
He enters the tent and begins shaking her “Wakey wakey you sleepyhead, we are late!”  
  
“Just a few more moments Ash.”  
  
“I’m not Ashalle, it’s me,Tamlen and you have slept in on our day of THE hunt.”  
  
“Hmm hunt…” her eyes bolt open “Shit, the hunt! Crap. Crap, crap…” she sits up from under her furs. “Could you gather up my weapons from here when I get into the armor?”  
  
“Sure, just be fast!”  
  
“I know! Crap Junar must be pissed at me again.”  
  
“Well he was already grumpy this morning so yeah, he’ll be a little pissed.” Tam gathers arrows into quiver “Why are your arrows all over the floor?”  
  
Nelora has her back turned to Tamlen, she slides out of her night shirt and throws it on the ground “I was sharpening them last night, it took longer than expected.”  
  
“Again doing things on the last minute.”  
  
She pulls on the undershirt for the armor and begins to work herself into the leather armor. “I know - shitty choices but it’s still better to go on the hunt with the sharpest arrows and dagger and knife possible.”  
  
“You never change.”  
  
“Don’t tell me you don’t like it.”  
  
“I’m just tired from having your bum out of trouble all the time.”  
  
“Hey that’s what friends do; you scratch my back I scratch yours.”  
  
“Now are you done, we have get to get moving.”  
  
“Yeah, I’ll bind my hair on the way there.”  
  
They storm out of her tent and go back to Junar .  
  
Nel apologizes “Ir abelas Junar, I…”  
  
He cuts in “Arrows and blades sharp?”  
  
“Yes.”  
  
“Hand them over.” She complies.  
  
Junar runs his fingers along several arrowhead edges, then her dagger and finally her knife, on the last he accidentally cuts himself.  
  
“These are some finely sharpened edges, next time manage your time better.”  
  
“Of course Junar.”  
  
“You know I’m not angry that you are late, I’m just a little disappointed.” Disappointed is always worse than angry. “It is not just my time that’s wasting, it’s yours and Tamlen’s. The two of you have only the day, then no matter how the hunting goes I want the two of you back here in camp. Is that clear?”  
  
“Crystal.”  
  
“Ok now the rules, I’m sure you both know them by heart but still it is tradition. Each apprentice in the end of their apprenticeships has to bring back a pelt of an animal they caught themselves, that means no outside help, no working together and no otherwise cheating. It is forbidden to use a pelt of animal that has been previously caught. And I hope that you know that even more important than the animal pelt is that the two of you make it back safe, even if you have no animal, you two are a great treasure as everyone else in here, it would be terrible if anything happened to you. Now what are you two waiting for? - GO!”  
  
The two apprentices start quickly equipping their weapons. Mahariel finishes first and starts storming off towards the woods but Tamlen yells “Wait Nel!” She stops and takes a few steps back. Tam goes to her and hugs her tightly “Don’t you dare to get into any trouble out there!” She hugs him tightly back “Without you, never.” They break the hug and run into opposite directions.  
  
Junar reminds them “Remember you only have a day to hunt!”  
  
****  
  
It is noon, the clouds still cover the sky but the mist is gone, now if there were any animals then a hunter can actually see them. The funny thing is that there are no animals to notice. Sure there are a few tracks but they are old like a few days kind or so and there doesn’t seem to be any new tracks anywhere. Something just feels off, this forest used to be full of life, animals scurrying about, birdies singing , insects roaming- well insects are still here, like usual but there are less birds and even less hares. What is up?  
  
This is probably just overreacting and actually all is normal. All left to do is keep on tracking and searching, perhaps the situation will change.  
  
*****  
  
Another dead end of tracks and the sun is starting to set. This day is a nightmare, no one to talk to, nothing to hunt, just wandering along old tracks and game trails. Well there’s at least a bright side - the clouds are gone and it is warm. But still none of it seems to have a point, soon the day will end and she’ll have to go back empty handed when Tam’s going to be there gloating how he caught I don’t know a Great bear and the reason why I didn’t catch anything is because I’m too loud and scary or something. Would he mock her like that? Probably not, this is just her overthinking.  
  
Suddenly there is a faint sound coming ahead of her from the depths of the forest. There’s nothing better for her to do anyway so what can the harm be in a little exploring and following the strange noise.  
  
Mahariel starts to make her way to the strange noise, as she gets closer the noise becomes more clearer, it’s like a voice calling for something… a voice calling for help perhaps? As she has gotten a lot closer the voice starts to sound familiar but she can’t quite place it yet. Now she can make out the source and realizes – it’s Tam Tam, why is he handing from a tree like that?  
  
“Heelp, someone! Please help! Is anyone there?!”  
  
Nel quickly runs towards her friend. “How did you get up there?”  
  
“Nelora is it you?”  
  
“Of course I t is me, you silly.”  
  
“Rotate me that I’d see you. Wait slower, you’ll get my head spinning.”  
  
“Hey there, happy.”  
  
“Pretty much, now all I’d need is to get down from here?”  
  
She glances at the ground and seen that Tam has dropped his bow and all the arrows have fallen from his quiver “Why don’t you use your knife?”  
  
“I lost is somewhere in the woods.”  
  
“May may, that is quite unfortunate but no problem, I’ll get you down, gently.”  
  
She disappears behind a tree.  
  
“Nel what are you doing there.”  
  
“Don’t move so much or the rope will slip!”  
  
Nelora gently lets Tamlen to the ground.  
  
“Thanks, I was expecting you to shoot the rope so that I’d fall.”  
  
“You are so silly, but if you want that then that’ll be for the next time.”  
  
“No thank you, I’m pretty happy with the gentle approach.”  
  
“So how has hunting gone for you Nel?”  
  
She is quiet and Tam asks again: “Nel do you hear me?”  
  
Nelora mutters “This rope is not of elvish make, the materials are different and the weave is weaker and less practical, this seems to be like the cheap she made stuff. Tamlen you stepped into a shem’s trap.”  
  
“Are you serious, I stepped into a shem’s trap?”  
  
“I wouldn’t joke about something like this.”  
  
“Crap this s what I get for getting reckless, this hunt it’s just so… depressing, just like there are no animals or they have gone into hiding.”  
  
“Exactly and even the birds…”  
  
“…Are gone or just really quiet.”  
  
“Yeah.”  
  
“So what’s our next step?”  
  
“There’s no way that we’ll cats something today so let’s see if there are any other shem traps and perhaps even shem poachers.”  
  
“Poachers, why do you think that?”  
  
“A whole forest wouldn’t go quiet for a little hunting operation.”  
  
“Shit, you’re right but perhaps we should head back to camp and go for help?”  
  
“Where’s your sense of adventure? And would they believe if we don’t have strong evidence, just this silly rope?”  
  
“Damn it I hate when you get like that.”  
  
“So TamTam… you coming?”  
  
“Just no sappy trees this time, I don’t have my knife.”  
  
Nelora places her hands on her chest right where her heart would be and acts being hurt “Ouch.”  
  
****  
  
“This is insane there have been so many traps already and as we go further I seems that the area gets more intensely trapified.”  
  
“Nel we seriously should go back to the clan, they need to know of this.”  
  
“They will know of this but we are getting close, I can feel it.”  
  
“Stubborn as always. But because it is dark I won’t leave you alone here.”  
  
“You’re sweet but if you want then you could go, I’ll be fine.”  
  
“Seriously leave my best stubborn, danger seeking, troublemaker friend behind, perish the thought. We are in this together.”  
  
“Now can you see the light coming from there?”  
  
“Yes, there seems to be several campfires.”  
  
“This must be where the shems run this operation, now if I could get a little closer then…”  
  
“Please don’t tell me that you are going to sneak all the way over there to get a closer look, it is dangerous, you know that.”  
  
“What’s a little danger, it just helps me to stay on my toes .And shems are big and slow and stooped, used to their towns and stuff, they won’t notice a thing.”  
  
“Don’t go, I’m serious, I worry for you.”  
  
“Tam-Tam where is you sense of adventure, it is just a tiny peak and then I’ll come back.”  
  
“Fine I’ll wait here. Don’t pull any attention to yourself with your loudness because that is probably what sacred the animas away you now.”  
  
She drops her weapons and starts to sneak away, her eyes glint the moonlight and the warm color of the two fires in the shem camp. Do the shems now that our eyes reflect light in the dark, I hope not otherwise they may get suspicious, they aren’t as unnoticing as Nel thinks. Shems can be very unpredictable and dangerous. They don’t think they act straight away.  
  
Tamlen tries to keep a look out for Nel but she just vanishes into the darkness. That doesn’t mean that he is going to stop looking for her in the shadows.  
  
****  
  
Mahariel has been gone for a while, the moon is already high in the sky and there are clouds now. Tamlen hears the sound of cracking branches. He starts to look around, darkness, trees, the blackest shadows, no living creatures.  
  
Suddenly there is a hand on his mouth and anoher hand rests on his stomach pulling him closer. This someone voices a whisper to his ear that sends delicious chills down his back “Honey I’m home.”  
  
The hand is taken away from his mouth and Tamlen quickly turns around braking free of the someone’s hold “You and your humor. What took you so long, I was getting worried.”  
  
“This is going to sound discouraging but I have a plan.”  
  
“No. no, no, no no. We both know what happens when you say that you have a plan. No, a terrible idea, just nope.”  
  
“You even haven’t heard what I have to say.”  
  
“I don’t need to, we’ve been through enough to know where this is going to go.”  
  
“Just listen to me, kay.”  
  
“Just talk fast and remember I haven’t agreed to anything.”  
  
“You agreed to listen to me just now but we’re digressing. So The shem camp it is medium sized, has two campfires and at current time holds nine shems. The operation they’re running is big. They have dozens of crates of furs, stacks of traps and two carriages. It is amazing and infuriating how many animals they have poached so it is no wonder that the animals are gone from this particular area, by the way they are very loud and obnoxious.”  
  
“Get to the point Nel.”  
  
“Ah yea the point. When I was there I heard them talking about the Dalish, forest spirits and demons as it comes out they are stooped, so I was right.”  
  
“I don’t understand.”  
  
“Don’t you see silly they are dead afraid of the Dalish and demons, it seemed that some of them were going to piss themselves even listening the ridiculous stories about us. The Dalish are a band of blood sucking, baby snatching, child eating, mages who slaughter the humans they don’t eat for fun to get flesh-puppets for demons. And the forest is supposed to be filled with evil spirits that may be awakened at any moment who will seek revenge on these who did the waking and so on.”  
  
“So they are a bunch of superstitious shems.”  
  
“Yes and we can use that to scare them out of here for good.”  
  
“You can’t be serious.”  
  
“I’m dead serious. All we need to do is play a little ghost, ruffle some leaves and the humans will wet themselves and run away.”  
  
“They will attack you.”  
  
“First it is dark, second they don’t know the woods as we do, third they can’t see well in the dark and we can sort-of and forth they wouldn’t wrist angering a bloodthirsty forest spirit.”  
  
“Still a terrible idea, you’ll get hurt.”  
  
“NO I won’t. All we need is to make a big dummy, make some noises, make the dummies voice and rustle some leaves, the best moment would be if some big cloud would move in front of the moon because extra darkness.”  
  
“It sounds interesting and all but are you sure?”  
  
“Come on Tam-Tam let’s have some fun. For old times’ sake.”  
  
“Talk about pier pressure, I hate how you always get me into these things.”  
  
“Great let’s get cracking and oh don’t throw away the rope we got from the traps, this is going to be integral.”  
  
****  
  
The two elves have built a big demonic figure out of what they could find and snatch from the shem’s camp. The built thing is a beast it is the height of two elves and has 6 eyes improvised rom really shiny and reflective pieces of metal.  
  
The tree branches have ropes tied to them so they could be ruffled and the beast too is hanging with a rope in a tree near the shem camp. The humans they were in a state of sleeping and occasionally opening their eyes so it wasn’t difficult to do anything near them.  
  
Nelora whispers to Tamlen “Now let’s take our positions and remember let’s make a lot of noises of tormented souls and stuff, these shems will buy it, oh and don’t forget to add deepness to the ‘beast’ when I talk as it.”  
  
“Sure but be careful.”  
  
Nel looks into Tam’s eyes that glint in the moonlight and gives him an one-hand hug “You too, now I’ll wait for the cloud to cover the moon.”  
  
The two elves take their positions and wait. Nel is operating the beast and some branches near it and Tam is operating the branches on the opposite side of the beast and human camp.  
  
Finally a big cloud swims in front of the moon and the forest is fully dark, a big gush of wind slows and Nelora makes her voice as low as possible, strangely enough that sound that comes out of her is really demony “Who dares to disturb my slumber!”  
  
Most of the humans are woken they seem to try make sense of the darkness and Nelora repeats “Who dares to disturb my slumber, do you know the consequences of such deed.”  
  
A male human with a squeaky voice answers “Who is there?” as others wake the few who sleep.  
  
“Who am I ? WHO AM I? You puny weakling dare to speak to the spirit of the forest. I feel all the forest life, I am the forest life, all that is alive here is connected to me! The spirits of the masses you butchered called out to me, demanding revenge, demanding… BLOOD!”  
  
Tamlen makes sounds of tortured spirits “Revange! Kiiiiillll, blood for blood, crushhhh…”  
  
Another human steps in front of the squeaky voice and bows down “I’m sorry for the ignorance of my stooped friend over there, he doesn’t know what he’s speaking about.”  
  
“Ignorance is bliss; ignorance dies first because of it.”  
  
The squeaky voice cuts in “What power do you hold? You only speak.”  
  
“What power do I hold? WHAT POWER DO I HOLD? I am every tree, I am every living creature in this forest!” Tamlen ruffles the branches, one big branch even falls to the ground “I can squish you like insects, I can call upon the bloodthirsty dalish to slaughter you and later play with your leftover flesh to perhaps pay a visit to some close human village, I’m sure there’s much fresh blood there to help relieve the bloodlust of those you murdered.” A pot of stew falls into one of the campfires and the flame dies out, that is truly some great luck.  
  
The other humans surround the squeaky voiced man and scold him, “will you shut it, do you want to die.”  
  
“As I am weak and slow because I awoke from my slumber then it will take my time to come and get you all, you may try to make a run for it, I do like it when my prey runs.”  
  
“Oh please oh mighty spirit of the woods what do you want from us to spare our puny lives, we’ll do anything.”  
  
“BLOOD FOR BLOOD! Can’t you hear the demand of the souls you murdered?”  
  
“Death, revangeee, blood for blood, drain of bloooddd…”  
  
A human starts to cry “Oh please spare us, many of have families to take care of, this was just a way to earn enough to bring bread to the table. I have children who will go hungry at home without me.”  
  
“Why should I care of your puny troubles of life! The souls demand is clear- BLOOD. Although there may be a way…”  
“  
Oh benevolent spirit tell us of the way.”  
  
“I demand sacrifice and recognition and worship! Each full moon you’ll release one of your cattle to the forest to balance for the lives you took, I demand shrines of worship that are blessed in by your blood, I demand baskets of offerings left on the shrines and in the woods! I demand respect and not to be disturbed by the murder of masses, by the murder of my children!”  
  
The shemlen are nodding their heads “Yes, we’ll do so.”  
  
“GET OUT OF HERE BEFORE I CHANGE MY MIND!”  
  
And the humans take off as if their pants were on fire.  
  
She drops the rope that holds the beast and runs to Tamlen “Tam-Tam did you see that? Did you see it? We scared them! We got rid of the poachers!”  
  
“This was amazing, they ran off like little children!”  
  
“You were amazing, with the ruffling, the voices and braking the branch, they were so scared!”  
  
“Well the branch breaking was an accident. To think of it then with that we got lucky”  
  
“Speaking of lucky the thing of the pot randomly extinguishing the campfire was what sold the act.”  
  
“So you liked that I shot it down?”  
  
“You did that?”  
  
“Well yes.”  
  
“By the gods you are amazing!” She hugs him tightly “But now we have to get back”  
  
“Of course, we won’t need that animal pelt, this should be good enough.”  
  
“Hah good point, we’ll be the clever elven heroes. ”  
  
“This was just so stooped and flawed but so thrilling I feel so alive!”  
  
“Easy there boy, save some for Junar, he is going to be pissed.”  
  
****  
  
The two elves make it back to the camp still covered in mud and leaves from the toime the spooking shems.  
  
Someone from the camp yells, “they are here!”  
  
And the first to run up to them is Ashalle “Where have you two been?! I was so worried! Don’t you two ever follow instructions?! You were supposed to be back a while ago?! ARE you hurt and why are you two so dirty?!”  
  
Calm down as we were just scaring some poachers  



	9. Hunting Arrangements

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Traditions must be followed, no matter what you have done in the past.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “The only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars.” - Jack Kerouac

  
Tamlen and Nelora get called to Junar, the hunter whose apprentices they are. He doesn't waste any time explaining the reason why they got called there: " You´re here now cause the last hunt you were on failed and neither one of you completed their apprenticeships. I am aware that the reason why it went like that is a good one and you both handled given situation quite well. Still according to tradition you both have to bring in an animal pelt that you caught by yourself."  
  
Nelora crosses her arms on her chest "So no special treatment for doing well before?”  
  
"I believe it bought you two some credit amongst the clan but hunt wise no special treatment. Traditions are traditions."  
  
“Are you being absolutely serious?!We got rid of pesky shems without even hurting them in such a way that they won’t be back. Tell me how many people could say the same? So what if we didn’t bring back some animal pelt, you’ve seen us hunt and that should just add to why the Hunt should be considered complete."  
  
Tamlen keeps the subject going: "She is right. Thanks to us those shemlen found respect for the forest."  
  
Junar keeps his tone calm and gestures them to relax “This is the way we have lived for generations and the way we will live for many generations to come and as I said traditions must be followed so there is no need to get worked up about something like that. Anyway I'm done debating that subject with you two. Are we clear?"  
  
Both apprentices say tediously and disappointedly as one person: "Yes Junar."  
  
Their trainer seems to visibly relax; he lacks the uptight tension and even the corners of him mouth seem to be elevated a little bit. "Now let’s get to the thing I wanted to talk to you both about- the next hunt. Because you two can't stay away from each other and not get into trouble TOGEATHER then it has been discussed that you both will go on the hunt separately and on different days."  
  
That was a low blow for Nelora. The girl has always been together with Tamlen, she has always known that he is there for her and vice versa. What will she do if something like that happens again, if she gets stuck somewhere or gets injured? “Junar you can’t be serious? From the time we are little elflings to the day to our death we are told that the forest is a dangerous and a vital place that needs to be respected, feared and used carefully, even you remind us to tread carefully. So what should we do if something happens? What if we need help? It’s a well-known fact that there’s strength in numbers and that is what you are taking away from us- the safety tether.”  
  
Junar assures: “Dalen that was a fit of bad luck. No worries. The forest has been scouted through. I assure that the past events won't repeat themselves. And do you think that the other hunters always go hunting in groups`- No they don’t. Crowds mean that the chances for the quarry to be alerted are higher too. This is just the most real preparation you will get; this is what you’ll do for the rest of your life. The sooner you get used to it the better."  
  
Tamlen’s now changed voice is lower but it still brakes at times like right now “So you’re saying we could get into an accident but it’s just preparation for the future?”  
  
“Yes and no. The clan will know that you are on the hunt and if you won’t be back in time then we’ll come to look for you. And remember to trust your training because you have been trained by the best.”  
  
Nelora frowns as she tries to nail Junar’s gaze down with her forceful stare “Do we even get a say in this?”  
  
“Of course you do, you could always stay an apprentice and never become a true hunter.”  
  
Nel is clearly not pleased with the way that things are, still she sort of accepts the situation and asks: „Fine, When will we get our chances to end our apprenticeships then?"  
  
Junar looks at Tam-Tam and says: “You’ll go first Tamlen. Your proving will be in a week from now."  
  
Tamlen nods in arrogance. Nelora looks at both of them confused.  
  
She panics: “What about me?!"  
  
“No worries I haven’t forgotten you Dalen. You will go half a week or up to a week later than Tamlen."  
  
She whines. „Why so late?" Patience has never been one of her strong suits.  
  
Junar keeps his tone still somewhat calm and gives his answer:" Because I say so. And Tamlen is older than you. Now the two of you have quite some time to get ready for your provings, use that time wisely. I hope that you aren’t too shocked by this new information and if you are then it’s your business. Have a good day and a good one to two weeks of preparation and waiting.” He walks off and leaves the two standing there alone. Both Mahariel and Tamlen look at him leave. Only when they lose the sight of him they dare to start talking again.  
  
Tamlen turns to Nel with a cocky grin: „I guess it is a competition then."  
  
“I believe it is” She returns the look of confidence to him.  
  
Tam explains; “The one who gets the bigger animal wins.”  
  
Bubbling with confidence and sure of her succeeding better than him she answers: “Sounds simple enough but there is still a matter of the prize for the winner.”  
  
Tamlen declares theatrically: “Honor and glory that last till the end of times, of course.”  
  
“Now you have been reading too many storybooks because that is boring.”  
  
Tam seems to be suspicious, he’s voice has a new a tad bid lower and confident tone to it “Did you have anything else in mind?”  
  
She takes a step closer to him invading his personal bubble, shoots up a mischievous smile at him and curls a strand of her lose hair around her finger and then begins to explain: “How about if the winner gets to make the looser to do anything.” She pauses and scans his face. Tamlen`s cheeks and tip of his ears have turned slightly pink, his eyes look awkwardly away from her but there is a traitorous little smile that is haunting the left corner of his lips. Finally she continues speaking: “This “prize” can only be used once. So the winner better think it through before doing or letting the other one do anything.” She is still standing very close to him now looking deep into his, grey with a hint of murky light sky blue, eyes.  
  
There is a short silence between them. Tam tries to use that moment of time to shake of his blush and the smile which were not supposed to be there without much success.  
  
He clears his voice with a cough before speaking: “Sounds good enough for me.”  
  
He suggests as he reaches up his right hand: “Let's seal the deal with a handshake”  
  
Nel steps back slightly to make room for the handshake.  
  
They both shake hands and Nel comments ominously: “It is official now and there is no point of return.”  
  
He says just before breaking the handshake: “May the best man win.”  
  
Nelora laughs “You got that part wrong it is: May the best woman win”  



	10. The First Vallaslin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In every Dalish elf's life getting the Vallaslin is a big thing. But how to make the right choice, how to choose the right patron god?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "We were the people who were not in the papers. We lived in the blank white spaces at the edges of print. It gave us more freedom. We lived in the gaps between the stories." - Margaret Atwood

  
Nelora had passed the apprenticeship and now it is time to make it official to become truly of age, it’s time of the Vallaslin to keep with the tradition. When a Dalish elf comes of age, they prepare to gain the Vallaslin by meditating on the gods and their ways to purify the body, soul and the skin. When the time comes, the Keeper of the clan applies the blood writing.  
  
So ahead is but another journey to becoming an adult. The time of meditation, focus and prayers to find the part in self that most defines the got to dedicate the Vallaslin to.  
  
When she was a young elfling then what she thought was that the elf passes any of the apprenticeships and then boom just like that off to the keeper and blood-writing, but as it comes out there is more to it. Vallaslin becomes a part of one and stays there for life, it would be silly if a decision like that would be made on a whim, without looking into oneself, without reflecting and understanding what it all stands for and what one wants to stand for or who to be.  
  
It is just so much. Once thought that she’d most probably bare the intricate patterns of Sylase but now she’s unsure. She’s a hunter now so the markings of Andruil would make sense but it just doesn’t feel right. It always seemed to her that Valasleen are something to be proud of and are pretty at the same time but they are more…so much more. She has been told that the patterns don’t have to make sense to others, they must feel right and have the connection to the one getting them one but it is still hard to grasp. She needs the calm time to meditate and prepare because in that front she’s more confused than…ever.  
  
Tamlen walks by and sees her sitting near the great campfire “Why so gloomy`?”  
  
“What who?”  
  
“YOU, Nel. Why so gloomy, you should be over the moon because you are no longer an apprentice.”  
  
“Oh I am happy but just in deep thought.”  
  
“Thinking about how you lost the bet?”  
  
“Yeah come and rub it in. The bear hide I brought in was just a size of a fist shorter. ”  
  
“Yeah it was more than that, but you know what I’m not going to be a sore winner and I suggest that you won’t be a sore loser either.”  
  
“When you put it like that then there is not much room for objecting without being a sore loser so fuck it! You won fair and square so what will the deed be?”  
  
He teases her “Salty much?” Nelora sticks her tongue out.  
  
Tamlen chuckles and then he’s quiet and… uncomfortable? “About that…” He looks at the ground and then back at her “I’m not going to use it now.”  
  
“Wait what? You can’t do that. Wait you actually can but why torture me so?”  
  
“I have my reasons.”  
  
“You are evil.”  
  
“Not more than you”  
  
Nelora playfully and softly elbows him into the ribs.  
  
“Now look who is the one being silly and childish.”  
  
“Well I’m only out of apprenticeship and bear no Vallaslin so I’m not quite the adult and you aren’t either.”  
  
“So have you had any thoughts which god’s markings you’d go for?”  
  
“I was thinking about that just before you came talking to me.”  
  
“So that’s what the gloomy face was about.”  
  
“It is just so confusing, once I thought it was a pretty design that made one an adult and one of the people but now I know that they are so much more, they have meanings of themselves, they honor different gods and what they were. And in having the blood writing done then it becomes a part of you forever… what if I choose wrong, what if I’ll hate it and then I wouldn’t be able to look at myself because I hate what I’ve done to myself.”  
  
“You’ll always be beautiful to me… umm to everyone, we all know that. Even if you choose the Vallaslin that you don’t like you’ll still be beautiful.”  
  
She likes Tamlen because the can be fun and silly together but at the same time they can truly be there to listen and cheer each other up, just like he tried to do. “That was so sweet Tam-Tam, I’m lucky to have a friend like you.”  
  
He chuckles awkwardly “Yeah… a friend.”  
  
“So Tam are you ready for the time of meditation and soul searching that precedes the inking?”  
  
“Sure, not doing much, just sleeping, siting, eating, praying, drinking and the decreased amount of chores and obligations- I’m up for it.”  
  
“I’m glad but that means that there will be less time for us you know you, me and Merrill to spend time together because they will keep an eye on us that we’d deal with the soul searching thing for some time.”  
  
“Come on I’ll always make time for you, I’m not saying it’ll be easy but it won’t be just meditating and soul searching, we’ll have our time.”  
  
“Oh I just remembered that I was supposed to go to Merrill, she was going to tell me about the old elven gods, I’m hoping that hearing someone talk about them refreshes my knowledge on the essence of the elvhen gods and makes choices easier.”  
  
Nelora jumps up gives him a quick hug and hurries away “See ya later Tam!”  
  
“See you… vhenan.”  



	11. Reflection to the Patterns of Falon'Din

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reflection of self is the true way to get to know one, to find out who you truly are.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “Before I ask you to sit with me, I must be able to sit with myself, before I ask you to accept my pain, I have to accept the pain myself, before I ask you to love me, I have to be madly in love with myself.” – C.Thoth

It has been two weeks since she had her Valasleen done. Finally the meditation and soul searching had made it click for Nelora, what is a part of her and feels right is the Vallaslin dedicated to Falon'Din. She just likes what Falon’Din embodies, the compassion for the dead, the peace he brings through he’s deeds and even his folly of vanity and wanting to be worshipped feels right because nothing and no one can be perfect and she understands that. The idea of his essence may be a little strange, scary but then again it is beautiful and it is for her because she is different and it is not a bad thing at all. Even though she is a hunter she comes to contact with death more than often and so the Vallaslin even connect to her position in the clan- a hunter position, the taker of liver to lives in order to help her clan and herself live.  
  
She has noticed that after the period of time after finishing apprenticeship and before Vallaslin - the meditation time, it’s changed her a little, she’s calmer and she takes her time, there’s no hurry to anywhere and there’s so much depth in the nature, people in life and death around them. Everything feels fresh and complex and it is magnificent, it all is a miracle. Now the ideas of seeing the world and all wha is out there don’t seem well… too out there.  
  
As for the design of the blood-writing she got the simpler version of Falon'Din’s markings and the color of them is a darker natural shade of purple with some gold accents that compliments her amethyst colored eyes, it was a somewhat bold choice but when haves she been subtle.  
  
At this moment when she’s really an adult she doesn’t feel that much different, she is still the same person with a little wider view of the world and more responsibilities. Plus there are now expectations to find a bond-mate, have a family of her own, raise children but there is time with that - who would she bond with anyway? Everyone knows that she tends to be a little on the wild trouble side and that she’s a little hot blooded, who would be willing to tie themselves down with someone like her, she can be really difficult and stubborn-a real headache… then again all of that buys her some time to think of all of it, be her own person for a while and see where life goes.  
  
But does she even want to be bonded with someone? Does she even want children? It would be good to rely on someone really close like a bond-mate and intimate relations are nice too… especially if one would try out the things found in that book of Merrill’s … but it’s a lot and she’s just 18 and a new adult, no need to worry herself with such things, she’s got her whole life ahead of her.  



	12. Just say NO

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tamlen and Fenarel have gone fishing. It is usual getting food for the clan and relaxing bro talk time but then Fenarel brings up an interesting topic that is very close to Tamlen’s heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Always be true to your feelings because the more you deny what you feel the stronger it becomes." - unknown

  
It’s a misty summer morning, the air is warm and moist, clouds cover the sky and the sun is yet to fully rise. Even though Tamlen and Fenarel are both Hunters they go fishing food for the clan. Since Tamlen received his Vallaslin they’ve become even closer friends, they understand each other better when on the other side the friendship between Tamlen and Mahariel has grown a little more distant and colder.  
  
Fishing trips like these are great for relaxing and clearing one’s head. It is nice to be a part of a big clan but it just gets tiring when you are always around a lot of people, when everyone wants you to do something, when everyone has advice for you how to act and live your life… they all mean well but it can be just overwhelming. Fenarel understands him, he has always been the calm and wise for his age sort and the fishing trips to the river are a great possibility to say it all by saying nothing, being good friends and occasionally talking about the little stuff.  
  
****  
  
Its noon, the sun is high in the sky and the air is still moist and sticky, a really fitting day for lazy fishing. Tamlen looks at a bee slowly buzzing by. Even it seems to be taking life easy at a non-hasty pace…  
  
A voice interrupts “Hey daydreamer you have a bite.”  
  
Tam glances at the cork and sees that it is being played with by a fish, the creature tugs it slightly, let’s go, tugs a little stronger and let’s go again- it’s like a slow dance of grabbing and releasing the bate while getting bolder, soon the fish will take the bait fully. Finally the floater is underwater and the rope is tense, the fish is trying to swim away but it’s hooked and all left to do is to pull it out. A pretty decent salmon, it’s exactly the length from his fingertips to his elbow. He puts the fish into a basket.  
  
As he puts new bait on the hook Fen starts to make small talk “So have you noticed that Nelora has become more serious in the last year, to think of it she’s been more serious since she got her Vallaslin .”  
  
“Yes she has, she hasn’t gotten into any trouble and that is new, she’s always been sort of…”  
  
“…Troublesome.”  
  
“Sort of… yes… but not quite.”  
  
“So how do you get along with her now?”  
  
“We’re good friends.”  
  
Fen raises a curious eyebrow “Nothing more?”  
  
“Why would you think that?”  
  
“I don’t but I’m just asking. Now tell me do you like her as more than a friend?”  
  
Tamlen feels this strange panic inside like someone is squeezing his heart trying to see him react “I… I don‘t think so. Why do you ask?”  
  
“Just asking because I wouldn’t want to get between anything the two of you have.”  
  
“Why would you get in between anything with us?”  
  
He keeps his gaze on his floater and just speaks like it’s nothing special, like the subject is of the most casual kind “You see I’ve been thinking of asking her to become my bond-mate. She is a great hunter, she’s strong, she’s fairly good looking, she’s gotten more serious last year and it would make sense. Well she is still a little wild but I guess she just needs someone to tame her. And well if there’s nothing between you two then I could be the one doing the taming.”  
  
“Why would you tame her? She is perfect as she is.”  
  
“That’s coming from the guy who got regularly into trouble with the elders because of her.”  
  
“Yeah but why not Merrill? She is calm and sweet and a little quirky and as a bonus she has magic. I’m fairly certain that she can get really creative with it- if you catch my drift.”  
  
“I do get where you’re going with it but I don’t know about her, she just seems so distant, lost in her books, studies and all. Being the Keepers first can be demanding and I don’t know she is just not my type. So what do you think of my idea?”  
  
“I don’t know, it makes some sense… but are you sure that you are ready for it or if she’s ready for becoming bond-mates?”  
  
“I’m certain that I’m ready and how many options does she have. It makes sense.”  
  
“So when are you going to ask?”  
  
“I’m thinking that later today or tomorrow, there’s no point in waiting.”  
  
“I understand.”  
  
****  
  
Tamlen rushes off from the fishing trip early saying an excuse that he remembered that he has something to do, in reality he needs to find Mahariel and speak with her before Fen does.  
  
He quickly makes his way back to the camp, drops off the fish and begins to look for Nelora. She is near the campsite telling stories to the younger elves. She looks lovely today, she has her beautiful hair loose and her eyes sparkle gorgeously just like the children’s eyes who are listening to her. They seem to be hanging on her every word and who could blame them, she has a voice as smooth as river polished amber that is feminine and strong. “And from that day on we vowed never to…”  
  
He is out of breath when he gets to her “Nelora I need to speak with you.”  
  
“Oh Aneth ara Tamlen I was just finishing the story of how our vow as elves got started, I’ll be done soon then I can come.”  
  
“No Nel, I really need to talk with you now.”  
  
“Can’t you really wait for a moment, when I talk a little and answer a few questions?”  
  
“I can’t, this is serious.”  
  
She folds her arms on her chest and gives me the: I’m very busy and annoyed look “You know I don’t like to be paused to do anything else so talk then and do so quickly.”  
  
“Would you come with mw to somewhere more private?”  
  
“Are you kidding me, I’ in the middle of something important.” They have an intense stare off. Neither of them seems to budge but finally as a surprise to even Tamlen Nelora gives in  
  
“Ughh… fine, make it really fast then, and I’m dead serious about the fast part.” She turns her head towards the little elflings and smiles warmly “ Sorry little ones my friend here has something important to talk about, if you want to hear the end of the story then go to Hahren Paivel, he may even tell some more stories.”  
  
A tiny girl cries out “But I like to hear you tell stories.”  
  
“Aww you are sweet little one but,” sends a suspicious and annoyed glance over to Tamlen “my friend Tam here needs me elsewhere.”  
  
Tamlen pretty much drags Nelora to the edge of the woods where the clan is distant enough not to hear them or come disturbing.  
  
She seems to be angry “Are you happy now Tamlen, we are here, just you and me? What is this all about?”  
  
He begins to pace back and forth “Remember the bet we made when completing our apprenticeships?”  
  
“Yeah you still are hanging your ‘prize’ over my head, when are you going to use it?”  
  
He stops in front of her “Right now. Nelora you see soon Fenarel is coming to speak with you and he’ll ask you to be his bond-mate…”  
  
Her eyes go wide, she looks at the ground and then back at me “Wait what? To become his bond-mate!? Where did you hear that, you silly?”  
  
“He told me and I want you to just say no to him.”  
  
“Why would I do that? To think of it… it would make sense… We kind of get along, we are really different and there are no sparks but I do have a little difficult personality and thus I don’t have many options.”  
  
Tamlen grabs a hold of her shoulders “Nelora please just say no to him, if not for your honor for an agreement made in the past then because I ask.”  
  
She takes a step back and frowns “Why should I do that? What do you get out of it?”  
  
“Can’t you see I like you, I really, really like you. To me you are perfect. What others see as being stubborn and pigheaded I see as passion for things you care about, what others call madness I see as genius. I love the way you laugh and the way when something surprising makes you just burst out in laughter because of the little snorting laugh you make in the beginning, I love the way you care for things deeply, I like to be the one beside you in trouble, the one to help bail you out and be there. I love you.”  
  
She seems to be utterly confused, her eyes don’t sparkle anymore and she isn’t happy either “You love me?”  
  
“Of course I love you Nelora Mahariel, I think I have for a long time. Only now, when I saw that I could lose you to someone who doesn’t care for you enough, who doesn’t love the little things about you I got the courage to say something. To me there have been signs that we belong. Even the Vallaslin we bare shows that we should be together. I have the blood-writing of Dirthamen and you have the writing of Falon’Din. The two of them were soul mates. They grew up together. Don’t tell me that this is a coincidence, this is fate, a sign that we are meant to be and we are soul mates like Dirthamen and Falon’DIn. If you don’t feel the same about me then it’s alright but I don’t want you to be with someone who doesn’t love you fully, who wants to tame you when you are perfect as you are.”  
  
“I hadn’t noticed that connection between our Valasleen and it may be nothing. Many Dalish bare these markings you nor I aren’t unique.” She takes a deep breath “All of this is a lot to take in Tamlen. I don’t know what else to say to you or Fen. All of it is just too much.”  
  
He takes a step closer to her and caresses her cheek, then guides her face to look at him “Just say no to Fen when he asks the question, that’s all I ask.”  
  
She pushes his hand away “I need some time to myself, to think of it all. Shit this is too much. I… I’ll be back soon, I’ll… um… go hunting- alone. Don’t let anyone follow including yourself.”  



	13. Love Struck Full Belly

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All seems to go well for Mahariel but when things go wrong then they go wrong all at once, that is the law of attraction.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “She slept with wolves without fear, for the wolves knew a lion was among them.” – R.M. Drake

  
The two lovers lay under some furs coddling .The elves are so close that they can feel the other’s body heat and the bare skin and the soft wind of the other breathing. It is a wonderful moment of affection and closeness after being intimate. No words are needed to be happy and just BE there to enjoy the moment.  
  
Tamlen looks up at the sky through the leaves and casually asks “So Nel would you become my bond-mate?”  
  
She raises her head from Tamlen’s chest and looks into his eyes, which are grey with a hint of light murky sky blue in them, frowning “Come on Tam we’ve talked about this. I’m just not ready for it. I need time because who knows… I might want to see the world, be free and do things.” She glances down at his trained and slightly tanned naked body and smiles “And by the way we basically live as bond-mates without the luggage, just the fun bits, isn’t this enough for the time being?”  
  
He tucks away a strand of loose hair in front of Nelora’s face “I know you don’t want to be tied down but being bonded with someone isn’t just that, it’s celebrating something special between two elves- for instance us, it’s having someone there to support you at all times and it’s a beautiful tradition.” He slightly frowns “You make me worry. Are you truly going to leave the Dalish to go explore the world?”  
  
She sits up and just rants “Why do you have to make it so difficult Tam? Wouldn’t you be there to support me if we wouldn’t get bonded? And I don’t know yet if I want to see the world or if I ever will but I like to keep my options open. One can never know what is about to happen, life is just that unpredictable and all the happiness is supposedly a combination of luck and illusions so I don’t want to change the moment where I’m happy at.” She takes a deep breath and looks into his eyes that even have tiny specks of blue so dark that it seems black in them “But tell me haven’t you thought about learning of what is out there? Or haven’t you thought of the next Arlathven? Perhaps I’d switch clans to see and experience more of this wondrous world and its creatures.”  
  
He seems a little hurt “Would you leave me behind and just move on from what we have here just to see what life is like in another clan? Like what we have between us does not matter!”  
  
“There’s no way I’d throw what we have away. And I’d leave our clan when you’d come with me.” She takes his hand and plants a small kiss on it.  
  
He smiles a bittersweet smile. “I’d follow you to the end of the world but I’m happy in clan Sabrae and I think that you are too.” He looks down at their hands holding and caresses Nel’s hand with his thumb “By the way I haven’t thought about leaving the Dalish to see the world. All I need and want is with this clan: home, food, friends, and love. Why would I want to leave all that behind for something that I don’t know, something so uncertain for people who dislike us-elves, for a worse life away from closeness and traditions... I don’t want that. ”  
  
“I like our clan too, it’s safe and comfortable as well as familiar and I love it but I can’t help not to wonder. Just so you’d know if we’d get bonded then there would be expectations, which I’m not ready for.”  
  
“So you are afraid of people expecting you to have children? You don’t want to have children, Is that the reason?”  
  
“No I do want them but… later in life, when I’m ready, when we are ready. And I’ll be ready, I just need time, we need time for something as big as a child.” Nelora leans down on him smiles sweetly and kisses his nose “We’ll get there, it just won’t be now.” She nuzzles his nose “I love you, you know that?”  
  
“I do but you really know how to make me insecure about that with your world discovering ideas.”  
  
“Well someone ought to keep you on your toes.”  
  
“And because of that maybe someone should tame you.” He grins wickedly, flips the situation and pins her on the ground holding her wrists above her head.  
  
“Ouch, I’m hurt by that.”  
  
He whispers into her ear sending delicious chills and goosebumps down from her neck to her toes “No you’re not.”  
  
He kisses her ear and she giggles. Tam moves lower with his kissing to her neck, collarbones, breasts. A soft sigh leaves her mouth but Nel slightly shakes her head “Mmm…No…no, no, no… I can’t. I was supposed to see Master…” He bites her nipple; she gasps and curls her toes then lets out a whimper “hmmh… Varathorn, he needed me for something!”  
  
He focuses on doing things to her body to hear her pleasure “Are you sure that you need to go now we could just…” He kisses her lips.  
  
Nelora turns away her head, braking the kiss “No, I’d ruin my reputation of being responsible and reliable.”  
  
“What happened to the Nelora who got into trouble, always?”  
  
She grabs a hold of his waist with one of her legs, makes him loose his balance and flips the position freeing her hands and establishing dominance. Her voice is dangerous and lusty as is her gaze “She grew up.” Nelora looks at Tam with desire darkened eyes from top to bottom with her eyes lingering on his half hard on but then climbs off of him and goes to her clothes.  
  
She is putting on her smallclothes with her back turned to her lover “So Tam what will you do now?”  
  
He lay on the ground looking through the leaves of the place they’ve built for themselves “I think I’ll go hunting near the meadow in the east. That is IF you are going to leave me here.”  
  
She pulls on her under armor shirt and snorts “IF I’m going to leave you here… That’s not working on me. I’m not TAME enough for such pathetic attempts to be lured back into bed with someone.”  
  
“Hey it was worth a shot.”  
  
Nelora pulls her armor on, binds the straps, closes the buckles, ties all the tiny strings and leather strips. Finally when the armor sits right she goes back to give Tamlen a tiny kiss. “I suggest getting clothed. You can never know who or what you’ll run into in the forest.”  
  
He rests his hands on her waist as he takes a moment to look in her big amethyst eyes “No creature as lovely as you, that’s for sure.”  
  
She blushes a little, “Flatterer.” They put their foreheads together as she says “Just stay safe, you hear me.”  
  
“I hear you and don’t you dare to start getting into any trouble without me.”  
  
She runs a hand over his cheek, “We’ll see about that.” then gets up and leaves.  
  
****  
  
On her way back to the camp from their secret hiding place there are thoughts are swimming around in her head: is she ready to be bonded?- the answer feels like a no but it starts to lack certainty .Is Tamlen the one she should get bonded with? Is he the right elf for her? Do the others know about her and Tamlen? Do they know that they are more than friends? They must get a feeling that there is a little more between them but to what extent do they see it?  
  
It has almost been a little over year when they started being together and a little less than a year when they began being ‘together together’ and all of it has been the happiest time of her life. The seasons, months, weeks, days and hours have just flown by when she has been spending time with him. When she is around him the world just fades away, the reality starts warping. When Nelora is not with him the day can be rainy and cold but when they meet it becomes warm and sunny without it actually being that. It is wonderful to be happy and so in love that one gets lost in the other person, like she does.  
  
****  
  
When Nelora has made it back to the camp she seeks out Master Varathorn.  
  
She bows her head in greeting to the old master “Andaran atish’an, Master! I hope that I didn’t keep you waiting for too long.”  
  
“Andaran atish’an Dalen, as a matter of fact you did. What in the name of the Creators were you doing for so long?”  
  
She smiles blissfully knowing that she has a secret, so beautiful, so intimate and personal. There is this thrill with the meeting in the forest without others knowing that they are together. It always makes her smile when she thinks of the excitement of it. That’s another reason why the becoming bond-mates seems scary. What if the passion and thrill are lost when the sneaking out and fun secrecy ends, what if they lose the spark they have now. Could their love run out? “Ah Master I was just wondering the woods, the forest is so beautiful this time of the year.”  
  
The elder man’s expression softens “It is magnificent but that beauty hides danger within. In your case I’d guess forgetfulness. Since the time you got your Vallaslin you’ve been wondering a lot in the woods and living with our head in the clouds. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone so changed by the period of meditation.” Since time of obtaining her Vallaslin she has changed a lot, small part is thanks to the soul searching and meditating before having the blood-writing done and in large part to the relationship with her and Tamlen. To think of is she has forgotten many things while with him or thinking of him, like she is forgetting just now to answer or speak back when spoken to.  
  
“Have I really?” Even though forgetful all has always has worked out well but things never stay the same, it is known that the luck has to run out some time - it’s just a matter of when and how. It is said that perfection and happiness are illusions but they are illusions she likes and is lucky to have for as long as it is possible.  
  
Master Varathorn sighs “I guess it just goes with you getting your act together.”  
  
Nelora clears her throat “Khkhm. What did you need me for Master?”  
  
“Oh I have a list of things needed: some herbs, ironbark, a few smaller animal pelts. Just general things needed for the clan. I thought this would suit you because of the time you spend in the forest, so it would be easy for you to deal with that when you are away.” He pulls out a piece of paper from his pocket and looks over it as if he is trying to see if something is still missing from it.  
  
“When do you need it to be done?”  
  
He looks up from the list and smiles “The next few days would be great, take your time but not too much of it. Head out of the clouds for this, Dalen.”  
  
Master hands the list over to her. A few hares, elfroot, deathroot, ironbark, wild halla antlers… nothing too difficult to obtain. Even though presented with a new task her thoughts keep going back. Still she has been so happy and lucky in more than one way… It is common knowledge that it all has to come to an end still or because of that knowledge there is this weird feeling of forgetting something...something important. Nelora starts to repeat her thoughts:  
  
When… Just a matter of time… Lucky in more than one way… all has to come to an end…  
  
And just like lightning from the clear sky the stars connect to make a constellation when she realizes: oh crap! When was the last time when she was on her bloody maiden period? Shit two months, 3 months? She doesn’t know anymore. By the gods, how could she forget or not notice something like that? Shit, shit, shit, shit… It can’t be… she’s not ready for something like this… Who knows if one is…that? Perhaps Merrill, she studies the old magic and things. Perhaps she can check for it or at least give her some advice… yeah advice would be good too, perhaps a shoulder to cry on as well? Fenedhis she needs to see Merrill straight away. She should forget about master Varathorn and his lists, for now.  
  
Nelora crushes the piece of paper into her pocket and just runs off without saying a word to the elder Master, the person who she was having a conversation with.  
  
Varathorn is left there standing and looking of the young adult elf who has such delightful manners to run off in the middle of the conversation without saying a word. He scowls and grumbles to himself “What has happened with the youth always rushing somewhere… but I would be grateful if you’d get the things on the list still. It’s not like anyone is listening to me anyway. What has come of the youth these days… truly what?”  
  
****  
  
Nelora quickly runs through the camp heading to Merrill’s tent. “Mer are you there? I need to speak with you.”  
  
Mer opens the tent with her nose in a book “I’m here, you can come in.”  
  
Nelora is frantic. Her heart is pounding, tears in her eyes are making the world look blurry and the scare is making her speech fast and slurred “Oh I’m so glad you are here Merrill. I… I… I’m just not ready for it, but I’m not even sure that this could be happening; perhaps this is a false alarm! It can be that-yes? A false alarm.”  
  
Merrill looks at her best friend, who she has never seen so in pieces, so scared. She pulls Nelora to sit and puts her book down and holds Nel’s cold hands. “Nelora I don’t understand, are you alright?”  
  
She tries to make eye contact while speaking but she just can’t... she is ashamed and scared “I’m not, I am, well I don’t know…I…I… ”  
  
Merrill keeps caressing her cold hands “Close your eyes. Take a deep breath in and now breathe all of it out. Slowly in and out, now slowly in and forcefully out. Now tell me what is going on?”  
  
She is still doing the breathing exercise. Her head is dizzy but a tad bit calmer “I’ve missed my bloody maiden days for a while. I fear that I might be…”  
  
The other elf voice makes a jump to higher pitch “…Pregnant? How long?”  
  
“I don’t know, I really haven’t noticed… perhaps two months or more or less, I really don’t know.” She opens her eyes and stares at the ground “What do I do now”  
  
“I could try old magic to see if there is life within you.”  
  
She looks up to Merrill her tears glisten in her eyes “You know how to do that?”  
  
“Its old magic, rare magic and because I’m the keepers First I know things, I know magic. Now just lie down and well see about that pregnancy scare.”  
  
Mahariel lay down on the furs in Merrill’s tent. The mage straightens her clothes and asks her “Are you ready?”  
  
Nelora nods.  
  
“Now just keep breathing deeply and stay still while I cast the spell.”  
  
There is a blue light emitting just brightly enough from Merrill to notice, her eyes glow blue and a bright light sky blue shiny swirling magic gathers around her hands, growing its mass. The further the magic is from Mer’s hands the more mist like it is; the sight is beautiful the whole room seems to be filled with the said mist with tiny firefly like specks of light. Finally the mage places her hands on Nelora’s stomach. The magic makes her skin tingle and sends cold shivers all over her body. As Mer moves her hands on her stomach this strange bloated and warm feeling fills her lower part of the tummy and the cold shivers go away. All she feels is this warm tingling and slight bloating. The blue magic fades away from Merrill’s hands and the room. She opens her eyes that don’t glow blue anymore; they’re now just her normal green eyes.  
  
She takes a hold of Nelora’s now warm hand and smiles “There is life inside you. The life is new if I were to guess the age then I’d say he or she is about two months old.”  
  
Nelora quickly sits up and looks dead serious into Merrill’s eyes “How can it be?” She drops her head into her hands and thinks out loud “We always made sure he’d cum outside. It just can’t be. What will I do now?”  
  
Merrill hugs her tightly “I’m so glad and sad for you, I’ll be always here when you need me. If you want then I could see about magic that could end it. That is if you want it to end? Please don’t want me to end it.”  
  
She hugs her back and places her head on her shoulder. She’s letting her tears flow. These tears aren’t happy or sad or anything, they just are. “Thank you Merrill, but I need to talk to Tam first, it’s just so much and it isn’t just on me, it’s someone else’s decision too.” She sighs “You are a great friend do you know that?”  
  
“You are too Mahriel, you are my best friend and no matter what happens I’ll be there for you.”  
  
They end the hug and Nel brushes Merrill’s bangs behind her ear “You are just so sweet and precious. Merrill, don’t ever change.” The other elf smiles slightly “But now I… I just need to go and find him. I’m not the one to wait. The faster this… whatever it all is, gets sorted the better.”  
  
Nelora gets up from the floor and heads to the tent entrance but the other elf grabs her hand “Wait!” She stands up and wipes away the tears from her face and smiles slightly “Can’t let anyone else see your tears, they are a big private part of you.”  
  
“Thank you.”  
  
Nelora leaves the tent and jogs towards the forest’s eastern meadow, where Tamlen said he’d be. She has something life changing to discuss.  
  
****  
  
Nelora has made it to their meeting spot. All she has to do now is track, find the trail and follow. It’s simple because she has learned it as a hunter and she has hunted with Tamlen many times to know the way he moves in the woods.  
  
She sees freshly stomped grass and follows the trail. The trail changes a little from confident and casual walk to quiet and sneaking walk, in some places she can see that he has stood still, changed his position., lain on the ground. Perhaps he was looking at the animals or some other quarry.  
  
The distance to the meadow was quite short but the other hunter’s tracks show that he was stopping and changing his positions often while trying to stay hidden. Tamlen was onto something and so she should be careful, it would be wise of her to keep her weapons at ready.  
  
Suddenly the running of several creatures, focusing on the sound three creatures on two feet, different paces, different loudness of steps, different rhythm - probably shemlen. That can’t be good. The shems are running from something or to something or someone. Tamlen has to be here somewhere, he needs to be careful.  
  
The running of the shems comes to an abrupt stop. One of them yells with surprise in his voice “It’s a Dalish.” They have seen Tamlen. Nelora can see them. Three humans in strange raged clothing, in weird bright shades of colors that mismatch terribly and have no practical reason and Tamlen is standing opposite to them with his bow ready for shooting an arrow. She just needs to get there, fast.  
  
She can hear Tamlen using his threatening voice on the humans “And you three are somewhere where you shouldn’t be!”  
  
One of the humans threatens him back “Let us pass, elf. You have no right to stop us.”  
  
Fenedhis I hope that I’ll make it in time before am does something stooped. He has his bow on the ready; just don’t make any brash decisions.  
“No? We’ll see about that, won’t we?” Damn it Tamlen dial it down with the cockiness or it won’t end well.  
  
I finally make it to his side and I too draw out my bow, keeping it at a ready, just in case.  
  
Tam glances at me and sends me a slight smile but then returns to his hard and serious act “You’re just in time. I found these humans… lurking in the bushes. Bandits, no doubt.” Is he being serious? These shems who wear rags and have no weapons are bandits- joke of the year.  
  
One of the shemlen whines “We aren’t bandits, I swear! Please don’t hurt us!”  
  
Tamlen frowns even more “You shemlen are pathetic. It’s hard to believe that you drove us from our homeland.”  
  
The human looks confused “W…we’ve never done nothing to you Dalish! We didn’t even know this forest was yours!” The humans didn’t do nothing to the Dalish, don’t they know of history?- the Exalted march? They are still no bandits just very ignorant shemlen.  
  
Tamlen seems angry “This forest isn’t ours, fool. You’ve stumbled too close to our camp. You shems are like vermin- we can’t trust you not to make mischief.” He glances at me “What do you say, lethaliin? What should we do with them? ”  
  
She doesn’t trust humans either but there is something wrong with all of this, these humans should not have wondered so deep into the woods- there must be something they were looking for “Let’s find out what they are doing here?”  
  
Tam seems to be disappointed “Does it matter? Hunting or Banditry, We’ll have to move camp if we let them live.”  
  
A shem squawks “I- look…we didn’t come here to be trouble. We just found a cave…”  
  
The shorter shem with a squeaky and crackling voice glances over the shoulder of one of his friends “Yes, a cave! With ruins like I’ve never seen! We thought there might be, uh…”  
  
“Treasure. So you are more akin to thieves than actual bandits.”  
  
That shem must have been eating some interesting mushrooms because there are no ruins there, she’d know of it. “Are you being serious, we know this forest. There are caves, sure but no ruins. You LIE!”  
  
The taller human who the squeaky crackling voice was hiding behind raises his hands in the air like giving up “I…I have proof!” He looks Nelora dead in the eyes and she nods then he slowly reaches for his pocket and pulls out a smooth stone in the lovely shade of soft azure with some black markings and hands it over to her “Here… we found this just inside the entrance.”  
  
Tamlen shifts closer to the other elf to get a better look of the object and his frown turns to surprise “This stone has carvings. Is this elvish? WRITTEN elvish?”  
  
The person who gave her the rune smiles and speaks in a soft voice “There’s more in the ruins! We didn’t get very far in, though…”  
  
Nelora mocks him “Why not, scared of the dark?”  
  
The squeaky voice comments again when he peeks them from behind the taller humans shoulder “There was a demon! It was huge, with black eyes empty like the deepest wells! Thank the Maker we were able to outrun it.”  
  
Tam scoffs “A demon? Where is this cave?”  
  
A quiet human on the right side of their bundle finally speaks up “Just off to the west, I think. There’s a cave in the rock face, and a huge hole just inside.”  
  
Her fellow hunter keeps a steady eye on their quarry “Well do you trust them? Should we let them go?”  
  
She knows that Tamlen isn’t fond of humans and he wouldn’t even bat an eye if he’d have to put them down but to her it just feels wrong to take life so carelessly when there’s no need for that. “You’ve frightened them enough. They won’t bother us.”  
  
He growls through his teeth “Run along then, shems… and don’t come back until the Dalish have moved on.”  
  
Their expressions on their faces go to shock and then relief “Of course! Thank you! Thank you!” They scurry away with amazing speed. It isn’t soon until they disappear into the forest.  
  
Tamlen’s demeanor is now different and even his voice is happier and lacks now any intimidation. “Well, shall we see if there is any truth to their story? These carvings make me curious.”  
  
Wait what she runs off into the forest to just talk to him, then they ran into some shems and now he wants to go into a frigging cave. “No, this demon makes me cautious and I have something we need to discuss.”  
  
He smiles softly and kisses her nose then mocks “Scared of a demon like a little shem, come on it’s probably an animal or scary shadow that they saw wrong.”  
  
She looks up to him and frowns, then shoves him lightly “I’m serious Tamlen!”  
  
He runs a hand over her cheek and holds her hand “Come on we are already here, now just a little to the west and we’ll see the cave.”  
  
She looks away from his gaze and tells him again “But I need to talk with you about something serious.”  
  
“Nel we have all the time in the world, so let’s just adventure a bit. Weren’t you the one who wanted excitement and adventure in your life? Weren’t you the one dragging me off to trouble with you? Now it’s my turn.” She hates it when he uses her own words against her.  
  
“But Tam…” He places a finger on her mouth to quiet her.  
  
“I swear back at our secret meeting place, we’ll have time. Now where is your sense of adventure?” He lets go of her hand, pulls away his finger and starts moving away.  
  
She also hates also when he has a point and grumbles to herself “I hate you so much right now!”  
  
Tamlen has already wondered off far enough out of the understanding range of hearing.  
  
“What? I didn’t quite catch that?”  
  
She looks at him and yells “I hate you so much right now! Did you hear that darling?!”  
  
He chuckles.  
  
****  
  
There is this tiny path heading west that they are following, it feels strange, darker, the flora around there is dead, only a little green amidst all the brown and grey. As they get further the more of the nature is dead. Strange how they never got there and how they never saw this place before.  
  
In the rock face is a huge crevasse “This must be the cave. I don’t recall seeing this before, do you?”  
  
The place seems to dark, too wrong and eerie “No and I don’t think we should go in there alone.”  
  
He seems to be annoyed “There’s nobody else here. And I’m not running back unless there’ something to make a fuss over. Come on, let’s at least see what’s there. How dangerous could it be?”  
  
Nel mumbles to herself “Yeah still hate you.”  
  
He answers “Well too bad because I still love you.”  
  
They begin their slow descent into the eerie darkness “It…looks like the shem was telling the truth. But these ruins look more human than elvhen.”  
  
The narrow crevasse has turned into a big room. Roots of trees have broken through some of the walls and the ceiling of the room, there are spider webs everywhere. Suddenly out of the blue two strange giant spiders crawl out.  
  
She has never liked spiders, too many eyes and strange furry feet, especially when the spiders are giant. Thankfully they are easy to take care of- only have to take off the head and watch out for not getting poisoned or getting caught in their sticky webs.  
  
She pulls out her daggers and charges on the spider nearest when Tamlen unsheathes his sword and tackles the furthest one.  
  
When spiders defeated with ease they start to look around in the ruins. The place has many rooms and many spiders, some undead and a few traps. When they are walking through the place Tamlen suddenly stops in front of a statue.  
  
“I can’t believe this. You recognize this statue, don’t you?”  
  
She examines it a bit closer, seems to be elvhen, some god with a hearing stick “It’s worn but it’s vaguely familiar, reminds me of Falon’Din, you know, the Creator whose markings I bear.”  
  
“Exactly. Back when our people lived in Arlathan, statues like this honored the Creators. When the shems enslaved us, much of that lore was lost. “He glances over the hallway we’re in “This looks like human architecture… with a statue of our people. Can these ruins date back to the time of Arlathan?”  
  
“We’re nowhere near Arlathan. This proves nothing.”  
  
He seems to be in awe “We must have lived in other places, too. Even if elves didn’t live here, its architects knew of our gods.”  
  
“Fine but let’s just not sit here like sitting ducks for any of the undead to gnaw on.”  
  
He turns to face her, clearly upset “How often do you find something like this?”  
  
“Well as it comes out often enough to keep moving.”  
  
He comments “Still stubborn as ever.”  
  
“Wait you said that you love me as I am so this is what you’ll have to deal with.”  
  
They still wonder the ruins; it seems that they’ve been making circles around the place. The rooms and broken halls all seem so familiar to them.  
  
When Nelora has cooled down she began to notice that her Tam-Tam seems to be a little off. At first she just shrugs it off and let’ s him have his space but finally she stops and places her hand on Tamlen’s shoulder “Vhenan I see that something’s off – it is in your walk and eyes, don’t hide yourself from me.”  
  
Tamlen tries to smile but it is terribly forced and fake “It’s nothing, the elvhen history just gets me.”  
  
“Hey you are elvhen but you never cared that much for our history before to be this upset. Talk to me.”  
  
He looks off into the distance when a gentle hand guides his face to face her. Nelora can see the doubt in his eyes- those beautiful stormy eyes. She wonders if their unborn child will look like him or her.  
  
Tamlen meets her gaze “It’s really nothing… It’s just that this place makes me nervous.”  
  
“Then talk, that always calms you down.”  
  
“I suppose so… hey, weren’t you supposed to be assisting Master Varathorn today? How did you end up coming with me?”  
  
That was not what she was expecting from him. Should she tell him the reason now- tell him that she is with child in these dim and dangerous ruins where at any given moment they could be attacked? “I wanted to be with you, of course. And I really need to talk with you.”  
  
“I… thought that might be the case. I’m glad and we’ll have the talking time. These ruins are not the place for important talks.”  
  
“I guess you might be right this time. But tell me how did you know of the statue?”  
  
“There was a picture of a statue just like this in one of those old books the keeper never lets anyone touch. It was one of the old gods. The keeper called him ‘the friend of the dead’ ”  
  
“Falon’Din the god who is the brother of Dirthamen the same Dirthamen whose markings you bare and the same Falon’Din who’s marking are on my face. I’m surprised of how little attention you’ve paid to your sort of patron god.”  
  
“Hey I just chose what felt right and I knew that, it just didn’t come to my mind at that moment.”  
  
“Fine I’ll ignore your ignorance this time. But when we get back to camp then we’ll have a nice history lesson with Merrill about the old elvhen gods. And no arguing about that, you know you won’t win that debate. But other than that what do you think all this is?”  
  
“I’m not sure. This looks like a very old human place. Why would they build this? And why would elven artifacts be here? Maybe some of our ancestors lived here, in caves like the dwarves. I’ll stick to roaming the land, myself.”  
  
“I’d stick to the land too. I love the sun I couldn’t imagine living in darkness, away from greenery, nature, trees, stars and the seasons. This place is quite terrible- tell me why did you want to come down here so badly?”  
  
“I don’t know anymore. I have this odd sensation that we’ve… disturbed something. Like we just walked into a dragon’s lair. Well whatever it is, it… it won’t stop me. A Dalish hunter fears nothing! Let’s just find whatever’s here and get out. We can talk later.”  
  
Tamlen rushes off ahead of her. Nelora can see the familiar statue of her patron god and tries to reach her lover. Tamlen stops and asks her. “Have we been through this door?”  
  
She looks at it and already Tamlen is moving towards it but she notices a big pressure plate in front of it. On the last second she catches him by the collar and scolds “Watch where you’re going, you would have stepped on a pressure plate trap!”  
  
“Sorry.”  
  
“You’re sorry? Who knows what would have happened, I can’t lose you especially now!”  
  
He cocks his eyebrow “Especially now?”  
  
“Forget about it! Just let’s see what’s behind that door and let’s get out of here!”  
  
Nelora with the help of Tamlen pulls the heavy door open they take a few steps into the new room. The air is stale and feels dusty. Suddenly a rawr of a bear fills the room and the two elves draw their weapons.  
  
From the shadows emerges a great beast with a frame of a bear but it seems to be darker, partially rotting alive with furless patches and loose torn skin hanging. The beast has numerous arrows, polearms and even a sword stuck to its back and all that is between its hedgehog like bone thorns. Nelora wonders: How many have seen this creature and how many have perished in a fight with it.  
  
The two Dalish hunters draw their weapons. Tamlen takes the bear head on while Mahariel does some damage from behind the beast. Despite the sorry state that the beast is in it is quite strong and resilient. Nelora slashes its tendons and it is furious. In that anger and what seems pain it tries to maneuver its way to her but then Tamlen plunges his sword into the creatures neck and twists it until a pop of the spine can be heard. The creature stays up for a second or two and then falls on its side.  
  
Nelora keeps her eye on the dead beast; she goes near it, wets her hand and places her it near its nose. The beast isn’t breathing, it’s truly dead.  
  
Tam’s voice is a little shaky and upset “By the creators what was that thing?”  
  
“I don’t know Tam but I want to get out of here, now.”  
  
The fear and panic are suddenly gone from his voice. How can that be? “Wait let’s take a look around.”  
  
“Are you kidding me Tam?”  
  
“Come on, let’s at least take a look of this mirror first. Can you see the writing on it?”  
  
She throws her head back in frustration “Don’t tam.”  
  
He chuckles “No worries I won’t break it.”  
  
He walks as if mesmerized towards the tall looking glass. Nelora has to admit that the mirror is beautiful with its golden frame and beautiful elven carvings that those who have never seen would mistake for just ornaments when it’s written elvish. The glass part of the mirror is weird though. It is dusty and grey and it doesn’t seem to reflect almost anything.  
  
“Hey did you see that? I think something moved inside the mirror.”  
  
She knew that it would be bad, that it wouldn’t be a normal mirror. “Stand back. We can’t be sure that it’s safe.”  
  
It’s like he isn’t listening to her anymore. “See there it is again. “Wai don’t you see it? There it is again. Can you feel that? I think it knows we’re here. I just need to take a closer look. ”  
  
Nelora has a bad feeling in her gut mixed with curiosity because she saw the movement too. But still this feels off. She opens her mouth to protest but Tamlen is already standing in front of the mirror, touching it “It’s showing me places. I can see some kind of city… underground?” He takes a closer look “And… there’s a great blackness…” he’s voice is beginning to shake “It saw me! Help! I can’t look away.”  
  
She has a feeling that this is the now or never moment, now is the time to tell him what she wanted to all that time “Tamlen I need to tell you that I’m pregna…”  
  
Suddenly there is a white explosion and everything goes quiet, ad cold and dark.  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In game this would be the part where Mahariels meet Duncan but I'm not taking that route, this Mahariel will go through the bitter ending.


	14. Bits and pieces, gone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There is no Duncan to save her this time, there is no salvation from the slow burn of insanity, there is no escaping the corruption.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "We work n the dark, we give what we have. Our doubt is our passion, an our passion is our task. The rest is the madness of art." - Henry James

  
Nelora wakes with a headache, her head is spinning and she feels nauseous. She is in a dark tent, under some furs and has a bowl full of water next to her. She sits up and a warm damp cloth falls from her forehead.  
  
How did she get here?  
  
The tent door opens and the Keeper steps in “You are finally awake Dalen. How are you feeling?”  
  
Her throat is dry and scratchy “I don’t know. My head it has this empty hollow banging feel to it and I feel nauseous.”  
  
The Keeper walks to her and places her hand on her forehead “The fever is still there but it is smaller. Tell me if anything changes.” Marethari takes the cloth and dips it into water and looks at her “Lay down Dalen, you are still weak, you need rest.”  
  
Nelora does what she’s told “How did I get here Keeper?”  
  
The elderly woman squeezes the excess water out of the cloth and places it on her forehead “You and Tamlen had been gone for a few days and then we sent out hunters to look for you. You were found in the forest, near a burnt out campfire. You were so cold… many thought that you wouldn’t make it.”  
  
It is coming back to her… the cave, this strange mirror, her love, Tamlen. A sharp pain goes through her heart - where is he? “What about Tamlen, is he in the camp too?”  
  
Marethari looks away and takes a deep breath “He is still missing; the others have found no trace of him.”  
  
Her throat hurts as she speaks “You have to look for him! You have to find the cave. He was there with me, that’s where I last saw him. But don’t touch anything, the mirror is bad.”  
  
Marethari seems to be confused “What are you speaking about child? What mirror?”  
  
“There was this cave that led to some old shemlen ruins. The place was filled with giant spiders and the undead. The place felt wrong though, dark, dangerous, like a dragon’s lair with the high dragon awoken. There were vast rooms but one was special, one had the big mirror in it. He touched it and…”  
  
“And?”  
  
She begins sobbing “That’s all I can remember, that’s the last time I saw him. You have to look for him! I have to look for him!”  
  
“This mirror must be important; you’ve spoken of it in your sleep too. But Dalen now you must rest, when you are stronger you can lead us to that cave, there we can look for Tamlen, then perhaps we can find a cure.”  
  
“I need to go and look for him Keeper.”  
  
“No, we can’t lose the two of you especially when you are with child.”  
  
She had completely forgotten the reason why she went in those ruins. It was to tell Tamlen that they are becoming parents. How stooped she was, waiting for the moment, letting him speak her into waiting, telling that they had time. Where is that time now, where is he now? “How is the child? Is it well, is it sick too?”  
  
“For now it seems that the baby is well and unaffected by your illness. The child has great strength of spirit with it, it too is a fighter and for the unborn babe you have to put yourself first, try to become healthier. If not for you then do it for the father and for the sake of the babe’s health.”  
  
Nelora open her mouth to protest but the Keeper casts a spell and once again she is asleep.  
  
****  
  
Days had passed pass and she wasn’t getting much better. Finally she had convinced the Keeper that she was strong enough to show where these ruins were and she had a feeling that it was then or never. And believe it or not she, Fen and Merrill went there but still there was no trace of her Vhenan.  
  
When they had gotten into the ruins then the place was filled with these dark creatures that had the foulest smell of rot and looked far worse than the undead. Finally when they had made it to the mirror room, the big looking glass was broken, totally shattered. Merrill was disappointed but she was glad that the thing was gone.  
  
****  
  
First journal entry  
  
(The handwriting is flowing and legible. There are tiny sketches of leaves and vines on the edges of the pages.)

  
She has been told to keep a journal of note because she has been forgetting bits and pieces, things she has already done, words she has spoken. She should probably write that down, just in case.  
  
Today the Keeper tried some different magic on her to heal her, that felt different, colder. For a moment she felt terrible but then a little better.  
  
She has been told that the baby is still healthy and uninfected by her illness. But can she do it on her own? Can she raise their child when Tamlen is still gone? The hunters have gone on many searching trips but they always came back empty handed. Even she tried to go look for him but got lost in the forest. Thankfully she was found and brought back to the camp. – No more wondering alone in the woods. (She underlines that last sentence.)  
  
She has changed too. Her belly has gotten bigger- that’s good.  
  
Her hair is falling out, her eyes are going murky, and her skin is dry and its color has changed. - That’s bad.  
  
****  
  
Second journal entry  
  
(Handwriting is less flowing but it’s still legible. There are tiny sketches of the mirror, some dark lines that look like some tiny paths and dark vines with thorns on them, just like near the ruins.)

  
She has been having nightmares about that day, the mirror, about him. Last night he called out to her, called her to the forest, said that he is waiting for her but when she went out to look for him, he wasn’t there. She was lost in the forest but Merrill came to bring her back.  
  
(Following the previous text is written in capital letters) DON’T GO INTO THE WOODS ALONE!!!  
  
There are also these empty sounds in her head [There is a long scratched out part] that aren’t at the same time either. She can’t make out what it is, yet.  
  
Cried in the morning, until no tears came anymore. Tam where are you?  
  
****  
  
Third journal entry  
  
(The written lines are not straight, the have moved away from niche formation. There are tiny dark smudges on the page that suggest she was lost or didn’t know what she was supposed to write.)

  
Names and faces don’t go together. [Scratched out] Words on the tip of the tongue won’t match the things, the people. (There is a rough drawing of some elf that has the Vallaslin of Dirthamen)  
  
Voices in head LOUD but no understanding. Wants to hold onto head, feels like exploding but no boom. (The last string of sentences seems to be bending towards a big black spiral.)  
  
At nights hears him, goes to the woods, waits for her. Strong love and fear. Someone important, name has escaped. Green eyed sad pointy eared woman drags back. “We’ve talked about this don’t go to the forest alone. It is for your own good.”  
  
****  
  
Fourth journal entry  
  
(Handwriting is messy; it’s hard to tell which letters make up which words. All except the tiny white space near the words and letters is colored black.)

  
Whine noise screaming…Screaming…SCREAMING. Teeth biting into head, want to crawl underground, scream, want to find him, he can soothe the pain but green eyes is sad, tells that can’t lose Nelora too.  
  
Sun down, dark outside, feet taking to places. Green eyed elf always there, stopping. Why?  
  
****  
  
Fifth journal entry  
  
(Handwriting is chaotic. The sentences and words don’t form columns.)

  
Body changed, belly huge- doesn’t know why. Kicking sometimes too. (A big circle is drawn next to it.)  
  
Hair on head – gone (A circle with pointy ears is drawn next to it.)  
  
Fingernails broken and yellow- bad (A dark hand with spots on it has been drawn. Two of the fingernails are missing.)  
  
Eyes murky with dark spots- bad (A pair of black eyes are drawn next to it.)  
  
Skin dray and with dark spots- bad  
  
****  
  
Sixth journal entry  
  
(The handwriting is flowy and legible. There are no smudges on this page.)

  
Tamlen? Tamlen calling, remembered him. Has to go. He’s the one to quiet the noises in head…  
  
(In the end is a big drawing of a mirror between two statues. On the glass of the looking glass is a handprint.)  



	15. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Epilogue through the eyes of the green eyed elf.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "The life of the dead is placed in the memory of the living." - Marcus Tullius Cicero

  
“After the search for Tamlen failed Nelora she wasn’t the same. We went looking for him a few more times but it was like he left without a trace. Nelora didn’t take it well. With time she grew weaker, her skin was paler and her blood vessels shone through it, her hair begun to fall out and her skin began getting these blackish greyish spots. The keeper tried her magic over and over again but it was only a momentarily relief for Nel. After the healing sessions when I went to see how she was doing she always said: “The voices are quieter now.”  
  
Things were even worse when the night came. Mahariel couldn’t be left alone because she told us that she can hear him call out to her. There are many voices screaming in her head and he is there too and he is telling her to go to the forest and that he is waiting for her.  
  
It wasn’t just her body braking down but her mind as well. She used to be a brilliant hunter and a great dreamer but then she had the mind of a 3 year old. She often forgot to eat, to wash, to go to the forest for bathroom. All that was left of her was this shell of a person who she used to be.  
  
The keeper was almost certain that her condition wouldn’t improve and she worried that the child within her wouldn’t be well. Could Nelora stay alive long enough to give birth to the poor babe or would they both die as Mahariel’s mind and body decay away.  
  
The last time I saw her was a beautiful summer morning. I went to her tent and there she was sitting in the middle of it staring at the entrance point. Her skin was thin and slightly see-through, there were intense black circles under her eyes and her once beautiful amethyst eyes had turned to some grey shade with black dots all over. She was sickly thin; when she changed you could literarily count her ribs, only her baby bump seemed to be not underweight.  
  
Things got that bad that sometimes she slipped away when someone was supposed to be watching her and Nelora she wondered the camp looking for Tamlen because she had something to tell him.  
  
One morning I was meant to go take care of her, but she was gone. On the floor of her tent she had left her family necklace next to her journal.  
  
I don’t know where she went, why nor if she is alive but what I do know is that she’ll always be with me. She will always be with the clan and she won’t be forgotten. She’ll always be my best friend.  
  
Looking back at it all must sound very strange but that is what happens if the blight and the taint in the blood go uncured. Hawke it is a mercy to be put down before things get as bad with Carver as they did with Mahariel…”  
THE END

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took a bit of a dark turn.
> 
> This is it with Nelora Mahariel. Perhaps one day I'll see what happens if Duncan is there to save her and how the things will proceed from there but for now I'm going to let the dead have their peace.


End file.
